G TO THA R-O-T-H-E
He’s a beast from the Big East. And when his kicker isn’t missing potentially crucial field goals, he’s bouncing to five dollar beats and pimping Matt Grothe’s website in song.
MP3 File
The song is rapped and produced by none other than USF’s kicker Delbert Alvarado, the same one who missed three field goals against Auburn. Alvarado made the song for mattgrothe.com, mentioned a demure seventeen times or so in the song (check the website!), and according to Grothe “It’s a dang good song.”

The word dang just isn’t used enough as a modifier, dang it. As for the song, we must deliver some due credit to Alvarado, whose ten-cent street beats are pure Third Coast car-trunk-entrepreneur material-the song’s not terrible, though being an ode to Matt Grothe it does get a bit repetitive. We’ll know if it’s done the job if you hear Scott Van Pelt or Neil Everett drop a “G to the R-O-T-H-E” reference on Sportscenter.
Massive HT: Holly for working the transistors and vacuum tube to make this happen.
1
Tampa rules.
Comment by PB at BON — October 4, 2025 @ 10:31 am
2
My website is a link to that kicker’s Scout page. Somebody who looks like that as in a potential “To Catch A Predator,” star should not be rapping.
Kickers, any and all, should not be rapping.
Jeff Reed, you have potential competition, you batshit insane douche bag.
Comment by Coop — October 4, 2025 @ 10:31 am
3
Listen till the end…”website, baby”!
Comment by Holly — October 4, 2025 @ 10:32 am
4
Coop, like any 17-year-old doesn’t have a molestery moustache.
Comment by Oops Pow Surprise — October 4, 2025 @ 10:35 am
5
You’re right, ‘dang’ isn’t used often enough, dagnabit!
Comment by Some Other Guy — October 4, 2025 @ 10:36 am
6
RISE UP COLLEGE STATION!
Comment by Dat Nguyen — October 4, 2025 @ 10:38 am
7
Apparently, the recruiting race between the South Florida schools will be won by the first Athletics Dept. to construct an indoor recording facility.
Comment by Allahver Fist — October 4, 2025 @ 10:43 am
8
Alvarado?
Fuck that guy and the horse he rode in on.
Dumb untalented shit couldn’t kick a field goal to save his life. At some point, he will cost this team a game.
Fuckin’ kicker.
Comment by that 5.0 guy @ work! — October 4, 2025 @ 10:44 am
9
My name Alvarado, protect ya neck
Grothe protected mine so ya gotsta respect
That mothafucker got a mohawk, and I don’t know why
But he saved me from gettin ass raped by singlet guy
G to tha R-O-T-H-E
Comment by SpookyJuice — October 4, 2025 @ 10:52 am
10
#7, Nick Saban, surprisingly, has time to point out that USF players can’t get into other Florida schools, recording studio-equipped or otherwise.
Comment by BovineKid — October 4, 2025 @ 10:54 am
11
I always won the rap off in practice.
Comment by Chris Hetland — October 4, 2025 @ 10:58 am
12
Finally! Something to blast as I cruise down Fowler Avenue gawkin’ at the honeys.
Comment by The Great Barstoolio — October 4, 2025 @ 10:59 am
13
Alvarado actually missed FOUR figgie’s in that game. Though one was blocked.
Comment by James — October 4, 2025 @ 11:00 am
14
Yo team probably out try’na study and shit
We out try’na fuck your season up quick
My high school GPA was a 1.6
We pray to God everynight that I dont have to kick
G to tha R-O-T-H-E
Comment by SpookyJuice — October 4, 2025 @ 11:01 am
15
he may not get the hits on the field, but delbert gets the hits on the street
i predict my trunk will be beating with this and ‘do da heizman on dat ho’
Comment by chris — October 4, 2025 @ 11:07 am
16
not to mention he’s rocking a sweet ass mowhawk right now.
daaaaaaaaanng bawla!!
Comment by gerry dorsey — October 4, 2025 @ 11:14 am
17
I am sorry, there is a Third Coast in Florida?
Since First Coast is Jax, I am assuming Daytona to Miami is the Second Coast, and once go around the tip, wave to Cuba, kids, you end up on the Third Coast, the Gulf Coast?
Conversely, this is Tampa we are talking about, so fair enough.
Comment by Coop — October 4, 2025 @ 11:21 am
18
That song has more going for it than Crank that Soulja Boy.
Comment by Brian — October 4, 2025 @ 11:22 am
19
Chris Berman would have a field day with USF:
Matt (Johann Wolfgang von) Groethe
Delbert Alvarado (’s Number)
Comment by MiseanAuFan — October 4, 2025 @ 11:23 am
20
Please click on the new link, Orson, and run with it.
The backup RB at Jacksonville, they play on the same level as Davidson which means nothing to most, allegedly planted 20 lbs of marijuana in the starting RB’s, who is a freshman, dorm room.
He wanted his spot back, obviously.
That is the sort of thing that senior, formerly starting, RB should have done to the freshman RB in The Program. How was that not written into the script?
Comment by Coop — October 4, 2025 @ 11:27 am
21
#20, Coop
That’s 20 ounces, lawya.
Comment by Allahver Fist — October 4, 2025 @ 11:33 am
22
This attention makes all of us very uneasy. At least, it makes those of us who have been college football fans our whole lives uneasy.
Comment by tim in tampa — October 4, 2025 @ 11:36 am
23
“one of the top freshman players in the nation”
Not exactly Slick Rick, but it’ll do.
Comment by jebus — October 4, 2025 @ 11:38 am
24
Seems the kicker has a bit of a starry eyed crush on the QB… gives us all a little insight to the singlet clad fanbase and widespread acceptance of “partial qualifiers” at USF
Comment by Sabanite — October 4, 2025 @ 11:39 am
25
Cecil Coltrane is a great name.
He’s a running back. He’s a jazz musician. He’s both!
With pot!
Comment by Rival — October 4, 2025 @ 11:39 am
26
18: Uh, unless it’s got the little Asian kid hollerin’ to Barney, then I must disagree.
Comment by Oops Pow Surprise — October 4, 2025 @ 11:43 am
27
Yeah, I skipped over the weight part. Still, a good story.
20 lbs. would have been much better, though. Pity that.
Comment by Coop — October 4, 2025 @ 11:44 am
28
oooh neato. USF is quickly becoming da new U in florida, mix in their fans who all look like they belong in piscataway, and we gots ourself another thing to be proud of in this great state.
Comment by m — October 4, 2025 @ 11:48 am
29
#24
Having your advances spurned by The Grothe would cause anyone to miss 4 field goals.
Or so I’m told.
Comment by Rival — October 4, 2025 @ 11:49 am
30
What is it with football playa’s and dope? Bitch set me up…..Anonymous tip my asss…
“Uh yeh, I smell weed and its coming from Small’s dormroom. If he gets arrested, he cant play Sat, right?
Ok, just wanted to let yall Muthfockers know that he got weed….Naw Im just a concerended cititzen and shit…ya peace out…I think he bought it in a school zone. He may still have his gun here if ya gets here quick enough..”
Comment by Baby-Faced Genius — October 4, 2025 @ 11:49 am
31
No fucking way I’m downloading that.
Comment by Phat Phil's Titties — October 4, 2025 @ 11:52 am
32
Hell, if he wanted to really drive the bus, before the cops got there, he should have put up posters of Marijuana plants, Snoop Dogg, layed out subscriptions of High Times on the bed, had Cypress Hill playing in the background, with the movie Friday goin in the DVD player as the cops walked in….. assorted bongs, water pipes, pictures of Ricky Williams, Edgerrin James, Steven Jackson and various books Rastafarians hairstyles and books on growing Dredlocks.
Comment by Baby-Faced Genius — October 4, 2025 @ 11:55 am
33
Wow, 3 missed field goals? Did Auburn miss any? Makes the OT win far less exciting.
Comment by Tim — October 4, 2025 @ 11:56 am
34
#12 Barstoolio — don’t you mean honey dips?
Comment by Beatuofa — October 4, 2025 @ 12:01 pm
35
Orson-
I don’t have a link, but if you have time, please please please find the Kim’s Corner posting that was apparently on Fran’s website this morning, and now is gone. WJOX in Birmingham has been talking about it.
It’s absolutely fantastic, though it sounds incredibly fake. At one point, “Kim” says that she came downstairs in the middle of the night to find Franny on the floor, crying and clutching the Bible. Oh, and it says he is on Lunesta. Really gripping stuff
Comment by Tater Salad — October 4, 2025 @ 12:12 pm
36
Hey Tater Salad….
I think this is what you are talking about. I agree that it is extremely quetionable, but it’s awesome if it’s true. Here is what everyone is saying it said on ‘Kim’s Corner’
“Lastly, I want to tell the small segment of Aggie fans that continue to harass Dennis over this e-mail program that we are tired of it. Over the last week we have had for sale signs put in our yard, our home has had eggs thrown on it and I’m pretty sure someone slashed the tires on my car. You do know that he was only trying to keep the boosters that support the Aggie football team up to date with the on-goings of the team, don’t you? If what he and Mike did was so wrong, why were so many prominent Aggie boosters receiving the e-mails? Do you people realize that for years Dr. Gates posted information on an Aggie web site? Some of that information was directly from the e-mails Mike sent out. I know that if Dennis had won the national championship last year not one of you would care about this, but I guess that is the life of a football coach. Dennis is so depressed that he has to take Lunesta just to get a decent night of sleep. I woke up one night and found Dennis sitting in the floor crying and clutching a Bible he received from John Hagee during our time at TCU. All he wants to do is coach football and be a good husband and father. His dream is to win a National Championship for the Aggie Nation. Dennis just needs a little more time and he will give you all a football program we can all proud of. George Bush Sr. called Dennis on Sunday to let us know we have his full support, so I think all of you need to learn a lesson from him”
Comment by SpookyJuice — October 4, 2025 @ 12:18 pm
37
His rhyming skills are only parelled by his kicking skills. A true dual threat. To suck at both.
Comment by Scalz1 — October 4, 2025 @ 12:21 pm
38
*parallel*
Dammit
Comment by Scalz1 — October 4, 2025 @ 12:24 pm
39
Re: #7, here’s ths link:
It looks like Nick Saban has time for this sh!t:
http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/more_sports/2007/10/04/2007-10-04_nick_saban_full_of_bull_with_rip_of_sout-1.html
Nick goes sour grapes on USF’s academic standards.
Comment by Geaux Irish — October 4, 2025 @ 1:16 pm
40
After listening to this, I am reminded of a line from that great movie Billy Madison…
“We are all dumber for listening to that…”
Comment by Levi Akers — October 4, 2025 @ 5:50 pm
41
#39
In case you hadn’t heard, Lindbergh made it.
Comment by Brandon Lang — October 4, 2025 @ 5:56 pm
42
#39
If you hadn’t heard, Lindbergh made it.
Comment by Brandon Lang — October 4, 2025 @ 6:52 pm
43
I guess Auburn should have called a timeout just before he missed those 3?
Comment by Dr. Ed PHD.XYZ — October 5, 2025 @ 10:17 am