The Orgeron still awaits the arrival of prized recruit and expected starter Brent Schaeffer. The hold up is that Schaeffer is trying to finish up his course work at the Harvard of the west, College of the Sequoias. If this doesn’t happen soon, we expect The Orgeron will be angry; and nobody wants that to happen. So, for the love of all that is good about humanity, please pass that class Brent. I’d hate to see all the other innocent students, faculty and staff at the College of the Sequoias end up suffering the wrath of the beast.
The Orgeron is seen here warning California that an apocalypse is near if Schaeffer doesn’t report soon.
2200 yards. That’s the goal Adrian Peterson has set for himself this season. That would pretty well assure him of a Heisman Trophy and probably mean a pretty good season for the Sooners, but can he do it without breaking down? Well, he’s got a 12 game schedule… and if Barry Sanders could get over 2600 in 11, it is certainly possible.
Barry Sanders proved it is easy to stay healthy if you don’t let the defense touch you.
(more…)
Lo! The Fulmer Cup Scoreboard for the beginning of the home stretch looks thusly:
Notes, clarifications, and complete gross errors:
-Navy, on the clearing of all charges in the Lamar Owens case, loses all points. Corrections will be made shortly, and their record will be as squeaky clean as the launch tubes on a nuclear sub.
-Despite his impending transfer, Texas will keep Ramonce Taylor’s points. This is not a bad thing since Texas also gets to claim that their players get into hundred person brawls on peanut farms in the middle of nowhere, which is soooo Fight Club-hot of them. (The number of women we know who drool over the fight scenes in that movie is disturbing. Or encouraging. We can’t really decide. All we know is we’ve been punching everyone we know in the face for years, and no one’s ever called it hot when we did it.)
-We didn’t touch the Fresno City Community College story involving numerous football players and an alleged gang rape because it involves a community college, which is not within purview of the Fulmer Cup.
Please leave any notes on scoring below, since there’s so much on the table we’re sure we’ve missed something along the way.
See complete scoring here, and as always thanks to EDSBS Players’ Club Member BIGMIKE for maintaining the scoring.
SEC Media Days are going on now (Florida’s on from 10ish to 12ish today. We’re looking forward to Urb saying something like “nut up” or “beat them ’till they wet their pants,” or anything else identifying him as a guy who secretly watches tape of “UFC’s Greatest Knockouts” late at night.) They’re great sources for loads and loads of non-information usually, but in one case they actually provided shocking news out of Knoxville: Phil Fulmer is an admitted mutant.
“I’d never been through anything like I just went through,” Fulmer said. “It was a new experience. You’re darned right. My stinger is out pretty good.”
Phil Fulmer has a stinger? Yikes. He must only use it on pizza delivery boys, since we imagine speed would an issue for a rampaging Fulmer looking to stun prey. He must rely on surprise…
Don’t let him get too close, [NAME REDACTED]!!! On second thought, go ahead and cuddle up with him while you’re there.
