SLOW NEWS DAY: TAKE THIS TIME TO PURGE.
In lieu of refunding everyone’s daily subscription fees for what’s turning out to be the first letdown day following the OMG GREATEST FOOBAW WEEKEND EVAR 2K8, we’re taking a step back. There’s absolutely nothing interesting happening today, so we’re focusing inward and using this time to improve ourselves as fans by confessing our greatest cardinal football sins. We surveyed ourselves, fellow bloggers just as strapped for content as we are this afternoon, and a few intrepid commenters. The following is our preliminary list of trespasses against our fellow man, our school loyalty, and in several cases against humanity itself.
Forgive me father, for I enjoy the sounds of “Rocky Top”.
ORSON, Florida: “I like Georgia’s colors.”
HOLLY, Tennessee: “I think the recitation of Neyland’s Maxims is one of the dumber traditions in college football and would like nothing better than to see it scrapped.”
PB, Texas: “I don’t hate Kirk Herbstreit like I should. It’s pitiful. He has some weird charisma that overwhelms my rational mind. Maddening.”
SIGNAL TO NOISE, USC: “I’ve started to hate Mark Sanchez. I was uneasy with it; there was something I couldn’t place. I was kind of “well, he’s the QB of the team I root for,” but when the announcers last week compared him to Vince from Entourage, my hate made sense.”
ROCKABYE REGGIE NELSON, Florida: “I prefer games on TV to games in person.”
WORSTFAN, Ohio State: “I want Ohio State to lose again, so I can stop trying to rationalize how they still deserve to be in consideration to be “in it”. I say this as a holder of two Ohio State degrees and former 5 year resident of the 43210.”
BURRITOBROSSHITS, Florida: “Feigning love for the Buckeyes to get laid. Actually worked but I felt really dirty and guilty afterwards. I didn’t have the heart to tell her, though, so I just bounced.”
MONDAY MORNING PUNTER, Ohio State: “Daryll Clark is the man! He strikes me as the kind of guy that could take a girl out to a nice dinner the one minute and then toss her down a flight of stairs the next.”
LT. WINSLOW, Miami: “Fuck it. I don’t regret it. I shared a brief, romantic moment with my coke-whore ex girlfriend’s best friend inside the privacy of a stall in the women’s bathroom in the west endzone of the Orange Bowl at the ‘06 Miami-FSU game. There were little teardrop shaped titties and a baggie of white powder and I’d do it again if I had the chance.”
We feel better already. Please, do join the purge party below with your worst transgressions.
348 Replies »
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Pages: « 35 34 [33] 32 31 30 29 28 27 26 25 … 1 » Show All
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- I caused a ruckus by wearing a USC shirt into the tOSU section at the Rose Bowl, but I survived.
-right after finishing grad school at tOSU I took a teaching job in Michigan. And couldn’t help noticing how the landscape got nicer right at the border. And Ann Arbor is a nicer town than Columbus.
-my best experiences I ever had at a game as an undergradute were at Cal of all places. For awhile I wished I’d gone to Cal instead of USC and considered transfering.
Comment by oc phil — October 15, 2025 @ 4:27 pm
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Seriously…best.thread.ever.
Comment by zzgator — October 15, 2025 @ 3:41 pm
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I think the SEC, with the exception of 3 teams (Alabama,Georgia,Florida), will get waxed in Bowl games this year, especially if they have to play a Big 12 team…..(Vandy,Auburn,Tennessee, even LSU, maybe Ole Miss, this is assuming they all get to 6 wins)-I like Uncle Verne, Gary Danielson, notsomuch
mea culpa, mea culpa, glutemus maximus, mea culpa
Comment by Mr.Pelican Pants — October 15, 2025 @ 3:36 pm
327
This thread is a marvel. You are all little miracles of hate. (No, it’s a compliment.)
Comment by Holly — October 15, 2025 @ 3:26 pm
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hoodawg, UGA:
I find myself whistling “Rocky Top” for days after we play them. Especially when we lose. Dammit.
Everything I’ve read or heard from Tebow makes me like him more, not less.
The LSU “Roll That Tiger” opener gives me chills every time I hear it.
The Redcoat Band just sucks.
Georgia’s fight songs are repetitive, ancient, and no one knows the words to them. I envy the Texases of the world, who have half a dozen full-length fight songs that even their rivals know the words to.
Even if Georgia makes it to the MNC this year, I fully expect we’d lose to most of the other contenders (Texas, Oklahoma, USC, PSU, et. al.).
Comment by hoodawg — October 15, 2025 @ 3:24 pm
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At OSU, they yell “OH-IO”
At NCST, they yell “Wolf - Pack”
At UF, they yell “Orange - Blue”…
All of these sound cool, but at GT, we yell “Yellow!….Jackets!”
I have always had a problem with this as I have never liked standing in the stadium and trying to rile up our team while at the same time calling them “yellow”.
Oh…I almost forgot…It pisses me off that they tore down Heisman Gym, didn’t name the new building after him, and then they hid the bronze statue of College football’s most beloved figure somewhere inside where people walking by can’t see it. Seriously!? If this hasn’t cursed GT in some way, then it should…(It’s hard to tell if you are cursed or just have Chan Gailey as a coach.)
Comment by jacketexan — October 15, 2025 @ 3:21 pm
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@286: No, I spoke Bulldog. But we should both be ashamed of ourselves.
Comment by The Great Barstoolio — October 15, 2025 @ 3:20 pm
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Sparkyjbd, Penn State
1) I believe that Joe Paterno has been completely out of his element for the last five years. (Big shock I know)
2) The Penn State fight song is worthless and “Hail to the Victors” is the best fight song in college football.
3) For some reason, I don’t have confidence in Galen Hall.
4) Tailgating is done a giant muddy field that sucks balls.
Comment by John — October 15, 2025 @ 3:14 pm
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Golf-Type Applause Dept:
Thanks to everyone for amazingly interesting commentary…Glad I am not the only footbaw nut out there…
Comment by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me — October 15, 2025 @ 3:11 pm
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OSU many moons ago-
OSU marching band uniforms make look them look like mall security guards and their routines are stiffer than Ron Jeremy on a workday.
How can anyone have an inferiority complex to a craphole like Michigan?
I would not return to live in Ohio if my life depended on it.
I lost a bet to a UM grad colleague and had to wear his ‘M’ hat at the office all day the following Monday. I didn’t want to touch it and felt sleazy for weeks.
DickRod will make Lloyd Carr look like Stephen Hawking.
My girlfriend and I used to sneak into the ‘Shoe during the week and smoke tree amongst the 104,998 empty seats.
Notre Dame may want to try Div. 2 after they’re done being a mid-major.
Comment by A. glabra in Colorado — October 15, 2025 @ 2:59 pm