CURIOUS INDEX, 9/22/08
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Who wants to pose with a sweaty blogger? Walking down the docks along the Tennessee river, a reader screamed “ORSOOOOONNN!!!” We nearly leapt into the river, and then realized they meant us no harm other than the up close and personal discovery that we, in any climate with an ambient temperature above seventy degrees, are covered in sweat. Nothing says sexy like unshaven schlub in a ringer tee with coffee stains!
Thanks for y’all who said hello, and even bigger thanks to our hosts at at the Vol Navy, the crew of the James Gang. The summary will be up on The Sporting Blog shortly, but let us preview by saying a.) tailgating on a boat is Xanax-relaxing, and b.) we don’t think we’d ever make it to a game if Florida had aquatailgating. Booze plus boat plus ladies hanging out in skimpy clothes plus television equals immobility of a formidable degree. The pendulum says: not bad, all in all. Joel sums up Tennessee’s performance with cool precision: Despite our initial read, UT played a much better football game than appearances would indicate. Florida deserved the win because they (a) have vastly superior special teams play (b) didn’t have fatal miscommunications in their playcalling, and (c) effectively used the new clock rules to eliminate any possibility of a comeback. True: looking at the box score, Florida won the game through field position and Vol turnovers, not by incinerating their defense like 2007. Whether this is indicative of another 1-2 start on the way to clawing back into the SEC title race is a less a matter of Tennessee putting things into firm, rock-abbed shape and more a matter of everyone else falling apart at the right times…which in the SEC East is as much a possibility as any other. Gate21, however, merely sees sheep. Yes, but it was a dry can of whoop-ass…with Maker’s. Paul does some incisive investigative reporting and finds that Georgia fans-who came in droves to the game in Tempe-have a distinct and measurable effect on the local economy. Georgia will “black-out” for Saturday’s game against Alabama, but that really won’t matter: all visible light in the stadium will be sucked toward the immense gravitational pull of Terrence Cody anyway, so no one will be able to tell. You throw out the historical records when it’s WKU versus UK. Because there aren’t any, but don’t tell WKU linebacker Blake Boyd that. “We’re expecting their best,” WKU junior linebacker Blake Boyd said. “It’s definitely a big in-state rivalry, even though we haven’t played before. We’re just going to say the logical thing: whenever Bayern Munich wants to stop ducking Florida and man up and play us on the field like the inevitable natural Gator rivals they know they are, we’re ready. Mike Leach, love master. Mike Leach on dating. A woman should be forced to eat in front of you, seek out freaks to conversate about with your date, and be sure to set up “email mischief.” Lubbock has a steakhouse called “Kegel’s”. Lubbock is kinkier than we thought. |
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55 Replies »
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Pages: « 6 5 4 [3] 2 1 » Show All
30
On the subject of “Keeping Chicks Humble”…
As a woman I just have to say this. Have you boys taken a good, hard, critical look in the mirror? If not, you should.
That’s all I wanted to say.
Oh, and Mike Leach is a moron.
Comment by blon — September 22, 2025 @ 10:46 am
29
Anyone have a link to the video of Rutger’s Teel takin a swing at his teammate?
Comment by C-Train — September 22, 2025 @ 10:46 am
28
I have so many people I want to thank… I don’t even know where to start.
Umm… Orson, thanks for the great site, and plethora of flabby Florida chicks. Obviously couldn’t have done it without you.
Clay Travis, sir, I’m just riding your coattails.
(Tearing up) I didn’t want to do this. To all the gorgeous chicks that wouldn’t give me the time of day… I hope I can one day point out some non-existent flaw and repeat as the Blog Commentator Keeping Chicks Humble.
Thank you, thank you.
Comment by beerbaron — September 22, 2025 @ 10:35 am
27
Maybe I’m a little JoePa here, but nothing strikes me more than ladies in sundresses. I’ll take that over the over-obvious sexuality of the Jen Sterger Hooters’esque uniform.
And this pic only means these girls read, and blogs at that. The women I’m around do go much past celeb gossip mags and Cosmorexia.
ON that note, anyone who’s overly picky about these ladies must work in the fashion industry. And that’s no compliment.
Comment by MCab — September 22, 2025 @ 10:33 am
26
If it wasn’t for that tiny button with the “F” on it far right, I’d have absolutely no idea anyone was about to attend a football game. You don’t have to wear a jersey, but show some pride in your school, or something.
Comment by Brian O'Blivion — September 22, 2025 @ 10:31 am
25
To summarize Leach-in order to have a successful date:
1. Get her drunk on meat to loosen her up;
2. Go to a drive-in, (doesn’t it rain mud in Lubbock?)
3. If all else fails, make fun of people you see; and
4. Send each other porn.
The guy knows his shit, that’s for sure. This is how I won over the future Mrs. RCR. Except for the drive-in part.
Comment by RaginCajunRebel — September 22, 2025 @ 10:17 am
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Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s Cagle’s. However, it does serve quality steaks.
Unfortunately we can’t go back in time to see Pimp Daddy Leach work these stellar moves himself.
Comment by Raider Red — September 22, 2025 @ 10:15 am
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the video of Coach Leach was priceless…
now if we could only get one from Coach JoPa… “….well, you make sure not to hold hands with her on the first date - those kind of girls are not who you take home to mom”
Comment by InsaneCoachPosse — September 22, 2025 @ 10:13 am
22
I was really kind of hoping to win that award.
I’m not sad or anything. I’m just, you know, really disappointed and stuff.
Comment by Etch Westgrin — September 22, 2025 @ 10:12 am
21
Thanks, Orson, for that riposte. I love the phenomenon of guys commenting on blogs bagging on the appearance of women that are probably ten times hotter than any girl that’s ever talked to them. Really, love it. It’s not pathetic at all, fellas. Keep at it.
Comment by Papa Lou BSU — September 22, 2025 @ 10:10 am