October 19, 2025

THE ALPHABETICAL, WEEK EIGHT

Up and operational at the Sporting Blog. Z is for Zaire.

Also, please see our extremely rough sketch of the top 25 for this week, and tell us how grievously wrong we are for not putting [YOUR BELOVED TEAM] in here. Just like Cal fans did last week before they went and coughed one up to Arizona, coached by Mike Stoops, who loses football games.

At number one:


Eet mor tigerr.

And the rest:

2 Penn State
3 Alabama
4 Florida
5 Oklahoma
6 Oklahoma State
7 Georgia
8 Southern Cal
9 Ohio State
10 Utah
11 Texas Tech
12 LSU
13 South Florida
14 Boise State
15 TCU
16 Northwestern
17 Boston College
18 Brigham Young
19 Pittsburgh
20 Missouri
21 Georgia Tech
22 Minnesota
23 Kansas
24 Tulsa
25 Ball State

Leave comments below, as the first weekend of even semi-chilly weather here in Atlanta is giving us the urge to go out and devour an entire pumpkin pie. We will deal with this by going and devouring an entire pumpkin pie.

October 18, 2025

DANIEL, CHASED

Texas, Alabama, and Penn State just put in a kick at the 13.1 mile mark. Chase them if you dare.

LIVEBLOG: CHASE DANIEL DELIVERS IN 60 MINUTES OR LESS.

Liveblog: 8 p.m. B.Y.O.B. and let it rock.

OPEN THREAD, FIRST MEAL: ALTERNATE ENDINGS

The first part of the college football season is much like the fabled “alternate ending”: the story seems to be moving along for you, the hero gets in position to rescue the heroine clinging to the side of the train…and then they miss the cars, fall between the cars, and are ground to snausages by the wheels of the train.

ROLL CREDITS! Fortunately, we are into act two already, where your team is stitched back together, survives, and then finds themselves steaming along on a beautiful cruise through the ocean, the wind in their hair…and then everything blows up. Again.

Celebrate the cycle of life, death, and the magic of editing your football memory in the open thread.

October 17, 2025

EDSBSGPS: WHERE WE AT, WEEK 8

The weekend’s preposterously ambitious viewing agenda:

ORSON (ATL):
Georgia Tech @ Clemson
Texas Tech @ Texas A&M
Vandy @ Georgia
Ole Miss @ Alabama
Michigan @ Penn State
LSU@ South Carolina
Mizzou @ Texas

HOLLY (L.A.):
Texas Tech @ Texas A&M
Vandy @ Georgia
Ohio State @ Michigan State
Miami @ Duke
Missy State @ Tennessee
Mizzou @ Texas
LSU @ South Carolina

Contingent of LSU fans: IN OUTER FUCKING SPACE, APPARENTLY.

Television coverage maps are available at this indispensable genius website here. Travel plans, drinking goals, and observations on tonight’s Hawaii-Boise State tilt below, if you please. Happy weekend, and we’ll see you back here much too early tomorrow.

EDSBS RAW: NAKED SUSHI BUFFET PICKS, WEEK 8

#21 Wake Forest @ Maryland

ORSON, COMPLETELY IRRATIONAL. Wake Forest will win because, like Indiana Jones in a fight, they will be punched, kicked, scratched, pushed face-first into something hot, and then the improbably pull victory out at the last second with a field goal, or by a safety, or by Maryland inept’ing there way out of sure victory. Jim Grobe will lose an eye, but his one-eyed visage will be the last thing you see.

HOLLY, ALSO IRRATIONAL BUT WITH CRITTERS. Let’s see, shut out last week by Al f’ing Groh…yep, they’re due. Maryland, recipient of this week’s ACC Roundelay Enjoy It While It Lasts Because It Won’t, Last That Is Tiara. FEAR THE TURTLE.

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SO UNFAIR, BRAH. OR NOT.


Hey, I’m getting naked whether you like it or not. Little Matty’s never wrong.

Ryan Perrilloux in his time at LSU was associated with a counterfeiting ring, an alleged drunken incident at a restaurant, and other booze-besotten misadventures that ultimately proved to be too outlandish even by Louisianan standards. Meanwhile, Steven Garcia has set off a fire extinguisher, keyed a car, and gotten a few alcohol-related ticks on the record. You certainly wouldn’t compare the two, right? We mean…

Trouble with the law followed Garcia’s entry into college as it did Perrilloux, the nation’s No. 1 dual threat prep quarterback, who signed with LSU in 2005. Though never arrested, Perrilloux had several scrapes with the authorities and LSU coach Les Miles, who dismissed him from the team last May. Perrilloux landed at Jacksonville State in Alabama.

Like Perrilloux, Garcia was suspended multiple times and given multiple second chances after three arrests in his first 15 months on campus.

Okay, it’s not a totally inaccurate comparison, brah, even if you’re willing to throw out the “well, LSU police are more lax than Columbia police.” That’s a race to the bottom in terms of sketchy law enforcement. (With Atlanta at the bottom, of course.)

Honkie Perrilloux goes into the weekend with a chance to see action-if the whim of Spurrier the White sees fit-against LSU, an extremely dangerous team at the moment thanks to just getting asses sliced from body against Florida.

Remember that last year this game featured numerous trick plays, including the infamous flip-toss from Matt Flynn to Colt David. Miles called little in the way of wackiness last week against Florida; this week look for the Spike Jones playbook to come out, replete with cowbells, gunshots, car horns, crashing glass, and loopy slide whistles to follow. Two weeks in a row of bland LSU football cannot happen, especially going up against Steve “in the 3rd quarter, I will call a trick play” Spurrier.

Infamous flip-toss after the jump.

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BYU/TCU IN FREEKNICHOLOR METAPHORIVISION

BYU/TCU, summed up by LSUFreek.

Warning: horned toads in real life are not as mischievous or cute as they are in this cartoon, nor is surfboarding off the roofs of houses condoned by Bronco Mendenhall, BYU, or this blog. If you do it, though, please film it and send it to us, because it is funny when other people get hurt and go boom.

NORTH KOREA SAYS NICE TRY, RUNNING DOGS

NC State had a nifty card trick last night, but North Korea still says suck it, amateurs.


Do that, but with Tom O’Brien’s face, and we’ll all be impressed…and strangely sleepy, too.

CURIOUS INDEX, 10/17/08

Have you considered this pamphlet OH GOD OW OW OW OW STOP. BYU, Trey Parker; TCU, old lady at door.

If you would like the story of the game in an easy image, imagine every single player on TCU’s defense kicking every player on BYU’s offense in the balls for four quarters, over, and over, and over again, winding up with each one in a Rochambeau so decisive you couldn’t imagine being any worse than the prior, and then pulling back for another grape-smashing swing at holy-underwear-covered jumblies.

TCU sophomore DE Jerry Hughes had four sacks, including one in the first half where instead of tackling BYU qb Max Hall, he simply punched him down like a goalie fisting out a threatening shot. The loss had BYU so flummoxed they resorted to extreme profanity.

“We played like crap tonight. That’s the bottom line,” BYU defensive end Jan Jorgensen said.

The Utah bolus in our poll is half unknotted; for undoing this, we thank TCU, who make our rankings slightly less absurd now.

O-H! He-OWES! Joe the plumber, ower of back taxes and cheaply constructed national avatar, wore this sweatshirt to interviews:

Personal foul, touching the quarterback. Florida State’s offensive line continues to be the strength of their team, but Antone Smith is getting battery-prone in the run game, popping defenders with audible transferred energy. The Noles won 26-17 over an improving but still vanilla-thrilling NC State team. BTW, if the ruling on the field is any indication, it’s now illegal to hit the quarterback on an option, as NC State pulled a weirdass penalty for smacking Christian Ponder on a “helmet-to-helmet” that appeared clean to us.

Penalties don’t matter. Don’t tell the AJC that, though, who somehow ignores the massive losses at left tackle and defensive lapses made by the Georgia Bulldogs in favor of harping on penalties.

There’s just this huge pile of cash out here on the porch. Just sayin’. The spread for the Ole Miss/Alabama game sits at a whopping 13 points. Anyone familiar with the dangerous, erratic powers of the Houston Nutt Phenomenon knows this is free money, because if you are shy of actually calling the upset, then at least you can agree that Houston Nutt teams excel at scaring the shit out of superior teams in games, and then blowing it against lesser opponents. That’s free giggity right thurr-take it.

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