BUFFALO WINGS OF DESIRE: A PLAY IN SIX ACTS
You might wonder: how does an overeducated Volunteer fan feel about the game? How does “hallucinating in the key of Wim Wenders sound?” to you? If the answer is “too bizarre for digestion,” then read no further; if not, then please, venture into the dark caverns of Holly’s subconscious 24 hours prior to the Gators coming to Knoxville.
Sie sehen uns nicht. Sie chompen uns nicht.

CUTCLIFFE: Tell me, muse, of the storyteller who has been thrust to the edge of the world, both an infant and an ancient, and through him reveal everyman. I’m an old man with a broken voice, but the tale still rises from the depths, and the mouth, slightly opened, repeats it as clearly, as powerfully. A liturgy for which no one needs to be initiated to the meaning of words and sentences.

MAJORS: Are there still borders? More than ever! Every street has its borderline. Between each plot, there’s a strip of no-man’s-land disguised as a hedge or a ditch. Everyone carries his own state with him, and demands a toll when another wants to enter. The soul of today can only be conquered and governed by one who arrives at each small state with the password. So everyone migrates, and waves his one-man-state flag in all earthly directions.
FULMER: Sometimes I’m fed up with my spiritual existence. I’d like, at each step, each gust of wind, to be able to say “Now.” Now, and now, and no longer “forever” and “for eternity.”
MARTIN: To lie! Through one’s teeth. As you’re walking, to feel your bones moving along. At last to guess, instead of always knowing.
To be able, once in a while, to enthuse for evil. To draw all the demons of the earth from passers-by and to chase them out into the world.

MANNING: Stay alone! Let things happen! Keep serious! Do no more than look! Assemble, testify, preserve! Remain spirit! Keep your distance. Keep your word.
CROMPTON: Where are my heroes? Where are my own, the curious ones, the first, the original ones? Name me, muse, the immortal singer who, abandoned by those who listened to him, lost his voice. He who, from the angel of poetry that he was, became a poet, ignored or mocked outside on the threshold of no-man’s land.
Wait! I want to know everything.
You figure that out for yourself. That’s the fun of it.

1
Ummm…Miss Holly? My head is full. May I go home?
Comment by WhiteSpeedReceiver — September 19, 2025 @ 1:06 pm
2
I feel lost and sad.
Comment by Biggus Rickus — September 19, 2025 @ 1:11 pm
3
I’d make me have to read that again.
Comment by Allahver Fist — September 19, 2025 @ 1:18 pm
4
An overeducated Vol fan would be a middle schooler, right?
Comment by Darkknight — September 19, 2025 @ 1:19 pm
5
“They chomp us not.”
Overeducated, indeed. My head still hurts, but I am thoroughly impressed.
Comment by WhiteSpeedReceiver — September 19, 2025 @ 1:29 pm
6
Were anyone to have asked, I would have been able to advise regarding the risks of not taking the opportunity to shoot down airborne Germans at the first opportunity. First your cities are smoldering ruins, and then you are subjected to Teutonic melancholy in black and white.
Comment by Air Chief Marshall Sir Hugh Dowding — September 19, 2025 @ 1:30 pm
7
As we speak, Urban Meyer is texting Damiel Cassiel, a promising tailback at Belle Glade Elementary School.
Comment by PBC Exile — September 19, 2025 @ 1:32 pm
8
To tailgate, and have cheap light beer - and if you do it together, it’s fantastic.
Comment by gosouthgohard — September 19, 2025 @ 1:35 pm
9
Johnathan Crompton as Homer? Maybe Homer Simpson.
And “overeducated”? We all know you liked(and understood)”City of Angels” much more.
Comment by BDoc — September 19, 2025 @ 1:39 pm
10
Hilarious.
Bravo!
Comment by Tzubear — September 19, 2025 @ 1:42 pm
11
We all know you liked(and understood)”City of Angels” much more.
THAT is the most hateful thing anyone’s said to me all week. Bravo.
Comment by Holly — September 19, 2025 @ 1:46 pm
12
Man, these Calvin Klein commercials keep getting weirder and weirder.
Comment by The Fake Gimel Martinez — September 19, 2025 @ 1:53 pm
13
I feel hungry and alone. At least Coach Cutt can be the only man in history to coach brothers who went on to win Superbowls in successive years. That will never happen again….ever…..and without winning the Heisman or beating Florida(just a guess, just making shit up)
Comment by Mr. Pelican Pants — September 19, 2025 @ 2:00 pm
14
Mmmmmm.. Buffalo Wings….
Comment by skinnyphatman — September 19, 2025 @ 2:07 pm
15
Phil Fulmer in a leotard…
weeps for innocence lost.
Comment by CincySooner — September 19, 2025 @ 2:11 pm
16
@ Whitespeed
She even got the verb conjugation of “Chompen” correct, for far as imaginary regular verbs go. Impressive for a southern gal.
Funny how upper midwesterns are bound by the fact that we were the only ones who were actually taught German vs. Spanish and French in high school. Why you ask, it’s because we are all Nazis.
Oh wait, no politics, sorry.
Comment by meatybob — September 19, 2025 @ 2:12 pm
17
So are you guys replacing Clawson with Peter Falk?
Comment by furrer4heisman — September 19, 2025 @ 2:13 pm
18
#12 - Eli Manning Beat Florida twice. And I still hate David Cutcliffe.
Comment by Brent Schaefer's jimmy legs — September 19, 2025 @ 2:14 pm
19
@meatybob—In my head, it actually conjugates like bringen: chompen, chompte, gechompt. Sounds better, no?
Comment by Holly — September 19, 2025 @ 2:24 pm
20
Holly, apparently we all prepare for this game in our own special ways. I, in contrast to you, drink a fifth of Jack Daniel’s before lunch. You say potato…
Comment by Vol — September 19, 2025 @ 2:31 pm
21
nosmartinourfootballkthx
Comment by 3rdgrade — September 19, 2025 @ 2:32 pm
22
Möchtet ihr Chickenfingers chompen?
works for me…
Comment by gosouthgohard — September 19, 2025 @ 2:36 pm
23
Ich chompe, du chompst, er chompt, wir chompen.
Actually, I think I got away a couple times with tacking “-en” or “-ieren” to English verbs without actually knowing if they were proper words in German. I’m not sure whether I was a lucky guesser, or our teacher was just lazy.
Comment by Magic Hobo — September 19, 2025 @ 2:41 pm
24
Germany language alert - the verb bringen actually conjugates as bringen, brang, gebracht.
Comment by Chips O'Toole — September 19, 2025 @ 2:43 pm
25
Holly,
Manning looks upset. Is that because Woodson is sitting on the angel with bigger wings?
Comment by Anon — September 19, 2025 @ 2:44 pm
26
uh yeah, I said “Germany” language.
entschuldigung.
Comment by Chips O'Toole — September 19, 2025 @ 2:44 pm
27
That’s Tee Martin, nimrod. Like it says below the picture with him in it.
(Although that might still apply.)
Comment by Holly — September 19, 2025 @ 2:44 pm
28
Am I the only one who thought of the “Mr. Plow” Simpsons episode where Lisa asks Homer if that was his commercial and Homer replies, “I don’t know.”
Comment by Larry Langolier — September 19, 2025 @ 2:45 pm
29
This is one of those times that I am so thankful I graduated from UT. The other UT.
Comment by blon — September 19, 2025 @ 2:47 pm
30
Der Himmel über Berlin und Universitätfußball: Diese sind einige meiner Lieblingssachen.
Comment by PeteJayhawk — September 19, 2025 @ 3:02 pm
31
Gesundheit
Comment by Spurticus — September 19, 2025 @ 3:10 pm
32
my head asplode…
Comment by CoolPapaSweets — September 19, 2025 @ 3:23 pm
33
A few of those panels made me think I was looking at an Edward Gorey strip.
Comment by sonofsamford — September 19, 2025 @ 4:09 pm
34
with the german and black and white photos i was really hoping for a work of expressionistic genius but alas no apocalypticism or new man. bah. nevertheless florida will gesamtkunstworkit at tenn
Comment by trojanatyale — September 20, 2025 @ 10:58 am