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AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED ONCE SINCE 2003

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FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON, JUST AN ARBITRARY TIME PERIOD AND NUMBER

It’s amazing, when you look back, what a long time 15 years can feel like. A lot can happen in that amount of time. Here, for absolutely no reason and certainly with no ulterior motives, is a short, non-exhaustive list of things that have happened exactly once in the last 15 years.

[staring directly into camera]

I reiterate; each of these things happened once, which means that they have happened exactly as many times as anything else that has happened only once in the last 15 years.

Let’s begin.

  • A JetBlue flight attendant announced over the plane’s public address system that he was quitting his job, grabbed two beers from the service cart, and exited the plane through the emergency evacuation slide.
  • The Wake Forest Demon Deacons played in an Orange Bowl.
  • A homemade helium-filled gas balloon shaped to resemble a flying saucer reached 7,000 feet of altitude over Fort Collins, Colorado - while reportedly containing the six-year-old son of the balloon’s creators. After a pursuit that lasted more than an hour and traveling 50 miles, garnering worldwide media attention, it was discovered that the balloon was empty and the incident was a hoax.
  • The Kansas Jayhawks played in - and won - an Orange Bowl.
  • The mayor of Toronto was videotaped while smoking crack.
  • Longtime Today Show personality Al Roker threatened to “drop” a fellow user of the social media site Twitter “like a bag of dirt”.
  • The Western Michigan Broncos played in a Cotton Bowl.
  • The Alabama Crimson Tide lost to the University of Louisiana-Monroe Warhawks.
  • Two llamas, having been brought to an assisted living facility in Arizona for use as therapy animals, escaped from their handler and went on the loose through a retirement community, captivating social media users.
  • The Cleveland Browns won 10 games in a single season, behind a Pro Bowl quarterback.
  • Former television star Charlie Sheen, after a much-publicized public meltdown, embarked on a nationwide speaking tour that people actually bought tickets for.
  • The Runaway Bride. Remember that whole thing? Happened once, since 2003.
  • The Connecticut Huskies played in a Fiesta Bowl.
  • The movie “Crash” won the Academy Award for Best Picture.
  • English side Leicester City won the Premier League.
  • NASA Astronaut Lisa Nowak was arrested for the planned kidnapping of her lover, after having driven non-stop from Orlando to Houston while wearing a diaper and in possession of “latex gloves, a black wig, a BB pistol and ammunition, pepper spray, a hooded tan trench coat, a 2-pound drilling hammer, black gloves, rubber tubing, plastic garbage bags, approximately $585 in cash, her computer, an 8-inch folding knife and several other items”.
  • The Buffalo Bills made the playoffs, in a season in which they started Nathan Peterman at quarterback in a game
  • The Cincinnati Bearcats played in a Sugar Bowl, after completing an undefeated regular season and being robbed of a spot in the BCS National Championship Game by a bad call in the Big XII Championship Game that erroneously gave Texas a win over Nebraska.
  • “The Rent Is Too Damn High!” Remember that guy? That happened as many times as anything else that’s happened once since 2003.
AP
  • The Notre Dame Fighting Irish went 3-9 in a season.
  • The Notre Dame Fighting Irish went 4-8 in a season.

Yep, that’s a whole list of things that have happened exactly once - which is to say, they happened once, but did not happen more than once - in the years between 2003 and today. Log in and join the discussion below if you can think of any other things that have happened since 2003, but only once!

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