By now, even the most die-hard xenophobes among fans of NCAA pointy-ball have seen the goal. But what many don't realize, even among fans of "the World's Game," is that Robert "It's Not Easy Being" Green, the much-reviled English GK, is the latest example of the widening influence of eccentric American billionaires on English soccer.

While Malcolm Glazer's problems at ManU are getting to be a bit old-hat, Oklahoma's favorite fabulously-wealthy old coot, T. Boone Pickens, is bypassing the EPL and diving straight into the turbulent waters of World Cup Soccer. Pickens' beach-head is Rob Green, England's latest goalkeeper-with-hands-of-stone-and-a-heart-of-gold. Following the game in which Green's howler let the United States steal a point off their former colonial oppressors, Green explained his mental toughness in comments to the media. Said Green, "I'm 30, I'm a man, and you have hardships in life and prepare for them." Clearly, Green has been taking lessons in media relations from Mike Gundy, another T. Boone puppet. The Sun has not confirmed, but this seems to indicate that Green may be "influenced" by Pickens' clout.

T. Boone Pickens, patriot and soccer fan, has managed to prove that American free-market capitalism will always triumph over a colonial monarchy with no hands.