Brandon Spikes, monster linebacker and budding Derrick Brooks As Midfielder clone, will return to the University of Florida next year. We're so happy at this news that we just punted a football into our ceiling. The dog is huddling in the corner wondering what she did wrong and there's a massive dent in the plaster, but it was totally worth it.
Did your pants just fly off? It's because you looked at this photo.
Also returning is Ole Miss DE Greg Hardy, who made an SI cover, allegedly coasted through football-related activities like games and practices, and will now have to return for a senior season to ensure maximum rookie bonus money with a full season of effort. Hardy is a terrifying defensive end when he wants to be, and when he doesn't want to be, he's not, meaning he will require the full snake-handling mesmerizing stare of Coach Giggitypants to maximize his market value. Won't that be fun?