We'd like to ask our readers: do you know anyone who lives in Beijing? And would be willing to have a writer/blogger type pay a fair price to crash on a couch, bed, heated kang, hammock, or square of filthy floor? And in do not tell me that "yeah, everyone I know is leaving town and getting out and you're right bullfucked when it comes to accommodations," because this is not helpful, and then we'll just have to tell you to go fuck to adjust the area.
China: rocking you like a hurricane since a billion years B.C. You're welcome for the kites and gunpowder, btw.
More fine Chinglish at the Chinglish pool. (Via Bethei.)