You know a fad's run its course when a football coach gets on board--they spend so much of their time walled up in the film room and texting teenagers that fashion is often the first casualty of a time-eating schedule, along with PR skills, remembering your wife's name, and properly untangling a headset cord from around your feet. (Watch how many coaches nearly die tripping on sideline cords--OSHA should intervene, dammit.)
Perhaps we can blame a busy schedule, stress, or simply enduring the weekly brainings that being on the Baylor coaching staff entails. Or perhaps Baylor o-line/tight ends coach Eric Schnupp really wanted to make it rain in the literal sense.
Eric Schnupp, Baylor’s offensive line/tight ends coach, was issued a citation at 2:20 a.m. for disorderly conduct-reckless exposure at Scruffy Murphy’s, 1226 Speight Ave., said Waco police spokesman Steve Anderson.
The citation was a Class C misdemeanor, carrying a $258 fine, according to a Waco Municipal Court spokeswoman.
The alleged incident happened around closing time, as employees were getting patrons out of the bar, said bartender Danny Severe, who was working at the time.
Severe said an employee witnessed Schnupp urinating on the bar, and a manager told police, who were already at the bar for an unrelated matter.
"While we were kicking everybody out, he apparently thought that nobody was looking and whipped it out and (urinated) on the bar," Severe said. "He tried to deny it, but there was definitely a puddle and there was no one else around him."
You always try to deny it. Schnupp's future on the staff is up in the air, according to Baylor coach Guy Morris, but he did have "several shots of liquor" purchased for him by others. We'd count this as a mitigating factor if his resume didn't list his playing career at the University of Miami, because the boys at Da U take shots at the bar like Fifty Cent, son! No excuses there, Mr Tinkly Pants.
(See? If you'd only stick to purple drank, none of this would have happened. You might OD on lean, sure--but you're not going to go alpha wolf in the bar and mark your territory on sizzurp. Next time, you stay frosty and grip 'n sip.)