A RECAP OF THE GEORGE EDWARDS ERA AT FLORIDA
by Spencer Hall on Feb 4, 2010 4:22 PM EST
40 comments
Do you even remember your first week at your job? There's finding the bathroom, getting your email set up, figuring out who your work girl/boyfriend is going to be, doing a quick scan of the staff to figure out which one person is so irredeemably insane you need to avoid them at all costs, and beginning the hoarding of office supplies you will eventually steal upon departure. You might also have had time to fill out your HR paperwork and, if you're Mike Locksley, generate a sex/age discrimination suit you'll eventually have to settle out of court. The punching has to wait six months minimum.
We doubt that George Edwards had that much under his belt by the time he got settled into Gainesville. Let's review his groundbreaking tenure.
January 8th, 2010: George Edwards is hired to be the defensive coordinator at the University of Florida
NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING
February 4th, 2010: George Edwards resigns from Florida and becomes the Buffalo Bills defensive coordinator.
WHYYYYYYYYYYY GEORGE WHYYYYYYYYYY.
It would be great to slag on him for leaving the day after national signing day if he really had played a substantive role in Florida's recruiting process besides making phone calls and telling people he was going to be there, but according to Ben Volin's sources Urban didn't even really realize he was leaving, and nowhere was Edwards mentioned in Urban's numerous and specific nods to other coaches in the recruiting process. (The exact phrase: "was not heavily involved.") The dude literally "up and left" to go work for Chan Gailey, who gave him a generous bennies package along with the mandatory Chan Gailey pudding break at 4:15 sharp every day.
(UPDATE: Now, of course, we're hearing that everyone knew this was going to happen, including coaches at other schools. Chan Gailey is an Ensure-chugging sorcerer.)
The leading candidates to replace him at this point are assistants Chuck Heater and Dan McCarney, who we're pulling for to get the job simply so the man can buy some new pants, for Tebow's sake. In the meantime,let us mourn the extensive achievements of George Edwards, who joins the Brian Van Gorder school of Coaches Who Break The Term ADD in half since they have trouble saying the whole thing all at once because OMG THREE LETTERS. His to do list at Florida follows after the jump.
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First Chan Gailey convinces the Bills owner to hire him, now he convinces Edwards to leave Florida for Buffalo. Watch out, he’s a Jedi.
by ESS EEE SEE Speed on Feb 4, 2010 4:32 PM EST reply actions
Then Reggie Ball must be one of those Pig Wasp things
that are immune to Jedi Mind Tricks.
by Silver Britches on Feb 4, 2010 4:42 PM EST up reply actions
That, my good commenter, was brilliant.
I’m not a GT fan, but calling Reggie Ball a pig wasp is actual audible giggle worthy.
HA HA Ben Franklin is amused by your program's misfortune
by Bourbon Dawgwalker on Feb 4, 2010 4:36 PM EST reply actions
Georgie, we hardly knew ye...
…and for some reason, I’d like to say I don’t give a kiffin, but I don’t even care that much.
Next?
Oh boo...
Who is going to coach our #1 recruiting class he fundamentals of defensive football. I’s has a sad. :(
I'm Banana dammit!!!
by BurritoBrosShits on Feb 4, 2010 4:37 PM EST reply actions
Oh, wait!
That time he had to pee on my leg at the beach to make the jellyfish sting? That was AWESOME.
OF COURSE THEY WERE
The man’s defenses never got scored on, EVER. Heck, an opposing team never completed a pass, or even GAINED A YARD. He never gave up a first down, never got burned on a trick play, all without ever giving up a SINGLE PENALTY.
Truly, the man is a coaching GENIUS. He will be missed.
by The Commenter Formerly Known as Not You on Feb 5, 2010 10:07 AM EST up reply actions
If George wasn't recruiting...
What the fuck was he doing the past month? How much Hexic can one man play?!?!
Easy to play while you're negotiating with the Bills.
Also, there was that time he started a club for smokers in his apartment! Uproarious!
Hey son!.... I was in that club.
But now it’s in buffalo and fuck if I’m going to brave that weather.
Fight on, fight on, fight on men! Remember the Rose Bowl, we’ll win then.
The trademark Chan Gailey “7-5 Season” expands nicely to the NFL, with somewhere between 9-10 wins a year being the proportional equivalent. Perfect for keeping your job without trying too hard and raking in all that nice NFL cash.
How could George resist that siren song?
Passing? Who needs passing?
$5 says none of the new recruits know who the fuck George is.
$10 says Chris Rainey knows every white girl in Alachua county. By ass size.
And I suppose that makes it better?
I would like to get some more production in the sack area-Les Miles
by One-Handed Grab on Feb 5, 2010 3:03 AM EST up reply actions
The George Edwards era makes me wistful for. . .
The Ted Roof era at Louisville http://www.cardchronicle.com/story/2008/2/21/13522/4835
RonP FOR DEFENSIVE COORDINATOR
I'm Banana dammit!!!
by BurritoBrosShits on Feb 4, 2010 4:56 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Awesome
Dance Ron !
DANCE!
Will Ebners Hit Parade, Pain TV; Channel 32; All the time! (PDT)
by MarioVanPeebles Republic of China on Feb 4, 2010 5:01 PM EST up reply actions
IT'S OFFICIAL
Alcohol is my anti-drug. CollegeGameBalls.com
by collegegameballs on Feb 4, 2010 7:15 PM EST up reply actions
Declare yourself Prince of the office interruptions...
with this limited time collectors item: The RonP-tone! http://www.sendspace.com/file/hjvmq5
Back by popular demand, this time sans download limits. K-STATE! K-STATE!
Laugh now
but Chan Gailey, evil sorcerer that he is, is near completion of a plot so complex, twisted, and evil that none of us will ever see it coming.
Unless he gets distracted by applesauce first.
Brian Kelly says no Burger King at 3 AM.
by Ancient Chinese Secret on Feb 4, 2010 5:16 PM EST reply actions
Let's get serious
Stop joking around and acknowledge the only real choice available: steal Al Groh from Georgia Tech.
by Tim James on Feb 4, 2010 5:20 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Yeah...
…that would complete the circle.
My Dawgs put a hickey on 'em!
by Gen. Stoopnagle on Feb 4, 2010 5:20 PM EST up reply actions
You know, Willie Martinez accepted Harbaugh’s offer to be Stanford’s secondary coach, only to turn right around and dump that offer the very next day for the same position at Oklahoma. So what I’m saying is, if you wanted to talk to him, I’m sure he’d listen.
Chan Gailey just hired me
And I don’t know how it happened. I swore this wouldn’t happen again, damn it.
STRONG LIKE BOAR
by Red Clay For Brains on Feb 4, 2010 7:01 PM EST reply actions
Vat ze 'ell...
…is with the temporal shifting and UF coaches? “Hi, I am Coach Billy Donovan, I are leavin’…err, no I not”, “Coarch Urban is retiring for health reasons…psych”, “Hello, I am George Edwards, your Gators new DC…on second thought.”
Auburn and Tennessee fans are a lot like Slinkys...neither are worth much but you do get a sense of satisfaction from pushing them down a flight of stairs
One theory
Clearly, Florida athletics is a great place to work — stellar director, amazing facilities, rabid fans, the ground all around you virtually bubbling with recruits of all kinds. On the other hand, you have to live in Gainesville Fucking Florida. That’s got to cause some internal conflict. I mean, when a guy says he’d rather live in Buffalo? Ye Gods.
by NCT on Feb 5, 2010 8:29 AM EST up reply actions
Clearly you've never been to Gainesville...
except maybe that year you got your asses kicked. That would color anyone’s view of that fine community.
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