DAWG I PUT THE TEAM ON MY FUCKIN' BACK. We remain so starved for offense that, in a moment of desperation, we resort to the virtual sort. This is a low, but at least we admit it.
The dramatic conceit here where the player enters the mind of Video Game Greg Jennings running with his broken leg is particularly well-wrought. You know he's entering his mind because he says "BEEP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP," the universally recognized sound of someone entering someone's brain.
WE TOLD YOU THE CONCUSSION DEFENSE WAS COMING. The girlfriend of Chris Rainey thought the concussion had something to do with his erratic behavior the night he texted her "Time to die," thought medical opinion is split on exactly how valid this line of thinking is. We're leading with this because writing about the potentially damaged brains of Florida players is almost as depressing as writing about the state of the football team as a whole. (That's not factually true, especially if Rainey is already displaying signs of CTE, but go with it in the name of blog microfiction.)
AND THEY'RE SO UNHAPPY NO ONE IS TRANSFERRING OR DECOMMITTING. A Tennessee recruit reports younger players at Florida are unhappy, which explains the lack of transfers and the continuing commitment of players. /nods #sense
GREATEST KENTUCKY SUBHEADLINE EVER. Kentucky can't overlook Georgia. Years from now, when life has returned to normal, remember that someone wrote this, and that it was funny at the time.
TURNER GILL WOULD LIKE TO RESPECT HIM ENOUGH TO CALL HIM "INCOMPETENT" WITHOUT THE "FUCKING" IN FRONT OF IT, THANK YOU. It's entirely possible Kansas could pull the plug on Turner Gill after just one year, though it would depend in large part on the possible replacements and the feelings of their new AD. We have no suggestions other than your next coach be bald and named "Steve" or "Ron." #RONP4KU #SteveAddazio4KU
BECAUSE THIS WORKED SO WELL FOR THE BIG 12. The Pac-10 may consider an irregular revenue distribution scheme allotting USC and UCLA an additional $2 mil a year until television revenues reach a certain threshold. After this point the teams will split the revenue equally, though if we were UCLA and USC we would make that threshold somewhere in the range of a gorillion dollars.
UNC REMAINS THE HAPPIEST PLACE IN THE WORLD. Especially now that their starting TE is out for the season.
WHAT HO, MAC? The Hustle Belt has your MAC power rankings. Yes, you needed them, and can admit it in this space among friends.