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We're working on a project with some of our guests who are in town this weekend, and unfortunately this requires us being in one place at one time. That place is not the internet, and RL SUX OMG LOL. It'll be worth it, though, and then hugs cheers and Schnelly shirts for all.

In the meantime, bullets for the brawlers: 


  • South Carolina looked fabulous last night, and did so against a really shitty defense, which is one of the reasons they looked so together and awesome, and why South Carolina fans can fairly raise a brisk wind warning flag of optimism but not a full gale force. Spirit Wolf Garcia looked awesome, but freelancing against Southern Miss is an entirely different matter than freelancing against Georgia.
  • Spurrier's interviews were gruff, nasal odes to crotchetiness. He was complaining about not being up 31-6 at the half, and this made little cartoon hearts appear and burst around our head. 
  • MTSU still almost beat Minnesota despite missing Dwight Dasher. In news from 2009, Minnesota is still probably an awful football team. 
  • Dave Wannstedt would put your money in gold, because that never goes down. Then he would allow it to be stolen from the back of your unlocked minivan. Pitt settled for the tie at the end, and then reaped the whirwind. Les Miles says he would have called a fake punt, but we can't all live like men, Wanny. 
  • That said, they lost to Utah, a team that is really freakin' good, on the road across the continent. There should be no rage because a.) valor counts, and b.) It's not like you didn't know the NFL virus hasn't swarmed Wannstedt's system and turned him into a hopelessly conservative coach at all moments. 
  • Rutgers creaked to a hideous start against Norfolk State, but Jersey Shore was on so the distractions may be all too explicable as to why they only started scoring in the second half. 
  • Jacory Harris looked exquisite against FAMU, but most quarterbacks do. 
  •  USC's defense remains rich in Vitamin Ass, allowing 642 yards, 36 points, 39 first downs, and keeping Hawaii in the game. Their best move remains Michael Morgan's forearm shiver, which should have been 15 yards for blows to the head, but this is Hawaii and the refs--when not pulling Hawaii TDs off the board and putting them back on for no reason--were shivering at the thought of a violent volcano death at the hands of Honolulu bookies. 
Keeley's Buffet is must-have reference material, and Holly will be along in a bit.