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IN TRANSIT, APOLOGIES, ETC.

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We've been moving slowly through the bowels of the American air travel system COUGH COUGH CONTINENTAL AIRLINES COUGH all day, and have thus been robbed of the right every American has to surf the internet while airborne. (It's in the Constitution AND the Bible. Look it up.) 

Is it that hard? AirTran does it, and AirTran is AirTran, for fuck's sake. The technology can't be hard. Continental still puts that little gold stripe on their boarding passes, and that alone probably costs them would it would to put WiFi in their planes, but some dickbag in a suit says "No, it's a trademark AHHH GURG FARTING FROM THE MOUTH" and we're left with "Did You Hear About The Morgans?", the greatest tragedy filmed since Anaconda. We refer to the numerous scenes where Sarah Jessica Parker is not eaten by bears, shot, or smothered while wearing a cow suit. I hate crying in public, but sometimes emotion just overcomes you. 

AIDAN WAS TOO GOOD FOR YOU ANYWAY HAGBITCHSECRETARIATFACE--

The Blogger Olympics is up over at SBNation with video evidence included. Additionally, Holly may be along in a bit to defend her new mediaphobic coach and his hair.