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CURIOUS INDEX, 12/4/2009

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Actual Highlights Of The Civil War: That's a bad mallard.

Oregon could only defend one guy named Rodgers, and it was the right one: James Rodgers had 10 catches for 139 yards and a TD, but Quizz Rodgers (fearless quarkback) was held in check for the most part (16 carries, 64 yards, 1 TD) while Oregon seized control late. Their second half offense was mastercraft: TD, TD, FG, run out clock, with the final drive only marred for viewers by Jeremiah Masoli's gory murder of Lance Mitchell on 4th and 3. Oregon goes to the Rose Bowl to face Ohio State. Don't giggle.

Cause of Termination: Mad Dickishness. Jason King's piece crystallizes what most have said about Mark Mangino's gunpoint resignation yesterday: he was essentially fired for being a dick, and dickhead coaches have a short leash while successful and an even shorter leash when not. You might hear a thunderous rumbling of bass later today on the topic.

You watch this one on television. Carlos Dunlap will be watching the SEC Championship Game from the comfort of Gainesville, as he did not make the trip with the team to Atlanta following his arrest on DUI charges. The coaches' luncheon is today, where Urban Meyer will mumble vagueness for thirty minutes, and Nick Saban will bite a bread plate in half just to show the catering staff he means business when he says he wants more butter for his rolls and wants it now.

Smashing the taillights on your car means I love you. Georgia defensive end Montez Robinson was arrested for the second time in a week. From the sounds of the article, Robinson is a passionate lover whose love sometimes manifests itself in the form of broken taillights on your car.

Mmm. Duck Fat. Last night's Solid Verbal is up, and the guest bitches endlessly about Charlie Weis, his 12-0 team's offense, and the rigors of making a decent cassoulet.