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CURIOUS INDEX, 10/14/09

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It's really a free public service announcement he's making.

That is a forceful hand gesture: confident, demanding, and muscular.

Unconcerned. Florida OC Steve Addazio is fairly meh-gcellent about criticisms of Florida's offense being sluggish.

"We can get the passing game going," Addazio said. "We’re the No. 1 team in the conference in third-down conversions. I’m not sweating that right now."

Essentially, Addazio is saying he'd rather see opponents submitted rather than thrown off the bridge only after being doused in napalm and set alight, then falling into the water into the mouth of a robotic shark whose stomach is filled with angry, starving piranha. BUT IT'S THE WAY OF OUR PEOPLE MR ADDAZIO.

Stafon Johnson and his iron neck: both recuperating, and heading home soon, most likely. Excellent news, since we root for anyone who drops a solid toll-booth attendant's worth of weight on their neck who lives. The ones who die, of course, have failed, and bring shame to their ancestors forever.

Distressed is one word for it. That is an appropriate category for Bulldogs gear at the moment. Doug has a loooooong thesis on a creeping and possibly fatal problem for Georgia, the terminal disease known as Tuberville Syndrome. It sounds nasty, but we only have personal experience with [REDACTED]'s Palsy, and will have to conduct further research.

Swing away, Knights of Rageahol. It doesn't even matter if you're losing your ass every Saturday: go ahead and punch whomever the hell you like, since decking your subordinates is 2009's new management version of a mid-year review. If you're punched in the face? You need work on your interpersonal skills. Punched in the stomach? Metaphorically and literally breathless due to poor time management. Cockpunched? Well, clearly you just deserved to be cockpunched.