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CURIOUS INDEX, 4/7/09

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Your real national champions take the field. Utah takes the field in spring, working in a pair of qbs (the likely starter being Corbin Louks) and reminding everyone that the BCS sucks a sick bull's taint.

A $44,000 asterisk. The claimed Big 12 title was more than idle chest-thumping across the Red River: Mack Brown's assistants got performance bonuses tied to the championship because of the snafu, a move cleared by the President of the University himself in order to get Brown's assistants the extra cash. "You see? You take care ah Mack, Mack'll take care of you." All of that Senatorial talent, just being wasted as a football coach; he's just a thumbpoint away from making it happen.

Yes. We see this. In a moment.

Major bummer. Florida safety Major Wright says being a football player hasn't really helped his love life.

How has being a Gator helped out your love life?

Just being a Gator, period, everyone loves all the Gators. Who wouldn't love a Gator? It hasn't really helped my love life, it just expanded some of the people that I know and some of the people that I'm closer to.

Further proof that Brandon Spikes' ball-hawking skills and dominating presence eats up more than just potential interceptions and forced fumbles. Also: injuries mount, Meyer won't talk about Percy's alleged positive weed test, and we have no backup o-line.

Prince wants you to sit on that couch, make him the starting quarterback. Kevin Prince is going to be the starting qb at UCLA most likely, due to the fact he has a strong arm, and also because Kevin Craft threw 20 interceptions last year to 7 touchdowns, and JESUS SON JUST TAKE A SACK.