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CURIOUS INDEX, 2/10/09

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That is fine work. From the boys at Six Pack Speak:

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The Seventh Floor Crew Takes the Bus. Miami will be taking buses, not flights, to Central Florida and South Florida this fall in a move to cut costs at the football program. We await the eventual glorious return of the Glitter 'Canes, and know it will have arrived if, during a bathroom break, they turn a Hardee's off I-95 into an impromptu brothel/nightclub in 15 minutes flat.

And in Glittery 'Cane news: The Seventh Floor Blog hits SB Nation with the force of Anthony Reddick's helmet swinging into an FIU player's prone body. Lt. Winslow and Barstoolio debut with a picture of Michael Irvin, and you cannot go wrong by sending a subtle message to your foes that if you trifle with us, we will slash your throat with a pair of scissors. Good luck: considering the sources, we expect Asian stripper gags and meth references galore. (In other words: pure entertainment.)

Well, she is quite attractive. According to an interview on Georgia DT Jeff Owens' blog, new UGA starter Joe Cox--the Ginger Ninja--finds Halle Berry quite attractive. She is, but because we find her most attractive as Storm in X-Men, that means we would insist on both the black leather catsuit and the ability to control weather, which combined with our impossible giantess fetish makes two fetishes we'll never, ever fulfill. Thanks, X-Men, for ruining our lives a second time. ("Those mutant powers will come in any day now! And not just the ability to drink vodka without being harmed and the power to name any song within the first nanosecond of play!")

That part. Oh, we really don't like that part. Tom Dienhart has a handy guide to the exact clause troubling Mike Leach so much in his contract renegotiation with Texas Tech:

Instead, the clause causing the most consternation is one that would require Leach to receive permission from Tech before talking to other schools about jobs. If Leach didn't comply, he could be terminated and forced to pay $1.5 million.

This maneuver shall henceforth be known as the Jagodzinski, if it wasn't already. Animals respond better to positive reinforcement, like more money thrown at them, or a lever that dispenses sugar cubes when you hit it. Either might work well on Leach, actually.