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CURIOUS INDEX, 2/6/09

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Give me a reason to hate you.... WHY CAIN'T YOU TAKE IT URB. Oh, like we needed a reason to get the healthy glow of radiant hate on in the first place, but add in the lace-doily church biddies of Tennessee becoming suddenly brash anti-establishmentarians, and we're lolling in a warm bath of haterade this morning. It's a brisk sea we're drifting in, but invigorating.

"In my enthusiasm for our recruiting class, I made some statements that were meant solely to excite those at the breakfast," Kiffin said. "I apologize to commissioner Mike Slive and the SEC, including Florida (athletic director) Jeremy Foley and coach Urban Meyer. My comments were not intended to offend anyone at the University of Florida."

BOW DOWN TO JEREMY FOLEY'S FREAKY BETOOTHEN VISAGE, KIFFYKINS.

foley0124
Whatever, bitch.

September 19th, Gainesville, Florida. Raining blood.

Slayer: in case you didn't get the point, they will helpfully cover themselves in fake blood while playing "Raining Blood." Just for clarity's sake.

Reprobatus Bibbs. Among many, many other current signees, consider the greatest name we'd never heard of prior to this article: REPROBATUS BIBBS. He was a former crack dealer turned UAB basketballer, but still: Reprobatus Bibbs. Reprobatus Bibbs. Reprobatus Bibbs.

Living Dangerously. Michigan decides to roll the dice and schedule another D1AA school.

Great article. Impregnate me. Being a journalist won't just get you a toehold in the door of a burning building of an industry: it will get strange women from Philly begging for your baby batter:

That's an amazing story. God bless this kid. I love the work you do, Joe. Will you have my baby?

That beats the comments we usually get on TSB by many a furlong. Though the formal answer is no, because we always finish our business as the men of our family have for generations, and that is crying naked in the yard with the garden hose wrapped around our neck. Traditioooooooon...TRADITION!

Butch Davis, recession fan. Butch Davis thinks the fundamentals of this economy are crap, and he's just fine with that as long as it funnels blue-chippers into Chapel Hill.