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The promised transfer panic begins at Michigan. Everybody panic, indeed. Sam McGuffie, midget white running back, should consider transferring to Florida so that we may diversify our shades of tiny quarkbacks. (Honkie="strange," for your quark categories.)

McGuffie, seen here in an early photo from MGoBlog, is allegedly looking to take his Dragonball Z toys elsewhere.

This will be cited as further evidence of the disastrous trajectory of the Michigan program, proof Rich Rodriguez should NEVAH HAVE LEFT WEST VIRGINNY COCK MOUTH TRAITOR, and so on and so on. This is presumptuous, and further proof that Michigan fans happen to be hapless virgins when it comes to programmatic chaos.

Ask an Alabama fan: this shit is nothing. You'll all be fine.