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CURIOUS INDEX, 5/23/08

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Boston College has "permanently dismissed" lineman Brady Smith from the team, though there's some good news: rather than being charged with rape, he pleaded to indecent assault and battery. This is good, because for future dating he'll be able to put "convicted of indecent assault and battery" on his Match.com profile. They don't have a box for "rape", and my, wouldn't that be a pickle of an explanation to give on the first date!

In case you wondered how Jamar Hornsby got his hand on a dead woman's credit card, well, here's one explanation.

Les Miles promises LSU will, indeed, have a quarterback on the field when the season starts.

“We’re going to have one in every formation,” Miles said Monday night, drawing laughs from the packed house at LSU’s Lod Cook Center.

We make fun of people in two ways: mean spicy, and affectionate-tangy. Miles, we fear, is moving over into the affectionate-tangy, since over the course of his tenure he's only grown on us more and more. The oddball press conference at the SEC championship game ("HAVE A GREAT. DAY."), the breezy rapport with the local press, the endlessly insane/ballsy fourth down calls, the fake kicks and punts...Les appears to have forgotten anyone's watching what he does, and that will do it for us anytime.

We once saw a guy on a toll road in Chicago working the booth. Pulling up to the toll booth, he had the door open despite it being around fifty degrees, and was wearing his toll booth worker's uniform open to mid-clavicle. He appeared to be in his mid-thirties. A stereo set up in the booth was BLASTING Foreigner's "Blue Morning, Blue Day," and he was doing a dance best described as "The Teamster Stomp" in the booth, a kind of high-kneed two-step stomp with accompanying fist pumps. The radio probably cranked about sixty decibels, but he could clearly be heard bellowing out-of-tune accompaniment to Lou Gramm's vocals.

This is precisely what we imagine the inside of Les Miles' head to look like: a toll booth full of rock. It is difficult not to like.

Drew Weatherford has recovered from arthroscopic knee surgery, a real accomplishment for people his age.

SMQ shows that Mississippi State's 7-5 season last year was more anomalous than one might initially think.