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RECRUITING RUMORS YOU CAN USE!!!

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The hottest in rumors from around the internets regarding recruiting! Who doesn't love blind items!

--WHAT USC RECRUIT was wooed by Pete Carroll to USC by his promise of whole blood daily because he is actually A VAMPIRE???

--WHAT ACE RECRUITER was seen singing "Learn to Fly" on Rock Band at a recruit's house and actually broke down in TEARS because his life at forty is a SHAMBLING WRECK OF WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN, making everyone present EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE IN THE PROCESS?

--WHO WAS SEEN BUYING BEER FOR THE 13 YEAR OLD SISTER OF A RECRUIT in order to prove he was cool enough to still identify with the kids?

(Surprise! It's Paterno!)

--WHAT UNIVERSITY will be investigated by the NCAA for recruiting violations after it was shown that boosters handed recruits McDonald's gift certificates worth DOZENS OF DOLLARS during campus visits?

(Surprise! It's Iowa State.)

--WHAT NOTED VIOLATOR OF TINY NCAA RECRUITING LAWS robbed an In 'N Out burger with a five star recruit this weekend "just to share the pure, unadulterated thrill of quick cash taken by force" with his shocked young counterpart?

--WHAT FIVE STAR RECRUIT made a FAMOUS HEAD COACH pee sitting down in front of a rolling camera just to earn a soft verbal out from him?

--WHAT COACH violates major recruiting rules by water-skiing past recruits' houses and waving...EVEN WHERE THERE IS NO WATER?!?!?!

--WHAT NOTORIOUS RECRUITER HAS HAD HIS FINGERPRINTS seared off surgically to prevent fingerprints from showing up on hundred-dollar bills shoved into recruits' pockets?

--WHAT FIVE STAR RECRUIT is actually a BEAR IN MEN'S CLOTHING?