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ALABAMA, YOU'VE BEEN DEADSPUN

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Yes, Deadspin hopped on the Alabama luxury condo/Katrina relief story before we did. Somehow Tuscaloosa was included in the Katrina Gulf Opportunity Zone (or GO! Zone, as in "GO build yousself a luxurrreee condo, joon-yah!) despite being 200 miles from the coast and decidedly unaffected by Hurricane Katrina. The tax breaks have gone toward, among other even more scurrilous things, we're sure, the construction of gameday condos in Tuscaloosa, complete with "$1 million for units with granite countertops, king-size bathtubs and 'Bama decor, including crimson couches and Bear Bryant wall art."

The real fallout will come from explaining to Alabama fans that writing all of this off is not already tax-deductible, even under Alabama law. Hey, until you cave in on the Shug Jordan memorabilia exemption in State Bill 1389, it's off the table, Bammer legislators. (Love, Auburn alums, Alabama Legislature chapter.) In the meantime, the IRS has some sweet audit steak just waiting for them in the form of all those $15,000 write-offs under "home churches" to Bear Bryant shrines.

When asked what he thought, Nick Saban responded with a statement involving the words "time", "not having any," and "shit." The best quote from the article:

"It is a joke," said Tuscaloosa developer Stan Pate, who has nevertheless used GO Zone tax breaks on projects that include a new hotel and a restaurant.

Fiasco, sir. Abomination! Um, I'm totally taking advantage anyway. He's quick he's strong he's legislatively shady!!! ALABAMA MAAAYYYUN!