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Two Indiana football players and one University of Indianapolis footballer didn't have the exact fare ready for a cab driver who took them home from the nightclub district of Indianapolis early Sunday morning. Fortunately, they had an exit plan: give the driver an address close to their actual house, run out of the cab claiming "they needed some rest," have one of them leave $8.00, and then skip out on the tab completely. (HT: Tomek.)

Sad for you, fare-allergics: the suburban Greenwood police department has very little to do on a Saturday night. Were this Atlanta, the responding officer would tell you he had a squad car full of trannie hookers stabbing themselves with their high heels to take in, and that like Nick Saban, he didn't have time for this shit. The Greenwood police called in backup, and after search of the neighborhood saw two men "running through the woods" near a golf course.

Somewhere in all of this the police found the football players at an aunt's house, got them to come out of the house, and get us all to the best part of the story, where offensive lineman Sean Edmundson fails a late-night math test.

The officer told the three men to come outside and they complied. Edmundson told the officer he had paid his share and the officer adviced (sic) him that $8.00 did not add up to 1/3 of the $39.00 fare.

Math-tastic! All three wre arrested and taken to jail for the night on charges of theft, which get Indiana three Fulmer Cup points: two for the pair of theft charges, and one for sucking at math even we can do, a truly damnable crime.

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