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MUSTACHE OF THE DAY: VALERY GAZZAEV

A Russian professional soccer coach sounds like a job capable of reducing grown men to tears, what with all the mafiosi breathing down your neck to toss matches and the endless stream of mascara-caked mistresses demanding money, cars, and booze. Not only does Mustache Wednesday Award Winner Valery Gazzaev manage to pull it off and still sport a Champion's League of a nose skirt, but his team CSKA Moscow defeated vaunted Arsenal 1-0 in Moscow yesterday. (HT: Kanu.)

In honor of your victory and your fine mustache, we pronounce yours as the Mustache Wednesday Mustache of the Day.

Stellar Hound-dog 'stache, tovarech.