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We thought we were down to our last post today--especially with the spotty access our hosting's been giving us--but college football types keep getting arrested and stabbed.

This final shot across the bow of your productivity for the day: Texas Tech DB Anthony Hines, who was stabbed in a bar fight at Club Heat in Lubbock.(HT: Chris) (Every college town has one of these instaclubs, btw: always named in the Miami mold with "Club" preceding some risky-sounding adjective, or perhaps just a name with the single adjective left to stand alone, like the area code of the town or the word "DIESEL" or "FEVER.") Hines was attempting pull people away from the fight when he was stabbed by an unidentified assailant in the midst of what was described as "a massive bar brawl," suffering a stab wound that punctured his colon in the process.

Two observations must be made here:

1. Add this to the Ramonce Taylor pecan farm brawl involving over a hundred people, and Texas is officially the brawlingest damn state in the Union. Look for A&M to bust out with a chair-tossing fracas in the next week just to keep up.

2. This story allowed us to type the chrase "punctured his colon," which will get us some fascinating search results over the next week. That it involved Leach's pirates is certainly thematically appropriate, since pirates and punctured colons roll together like peanut butter and crack.

Yarr! Punctured colon.