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BLOGPOLL ROUNDTABLE: PARADIGMBLOG EDITION

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Delayed answers to this week's Blogpoll roundtabling, found this time at ParadigmBlog.

In between attempting to kneecap old biddies wearing Michigan State gear on the street, Brent asks us the following questions of the non-burning variety:

1. We are now 1/3 of the way through the season and things are starting to shake out. With that in mind, who are your picks to win each of the BCS conferences, as well as your choice for an at-large berth from a non-BCS league (none is an option)?

ACC: Virginia Tech. Rippin' and rompin' and scaring the poop out of everyone in the conference at this point.

Big 12: Texas Longhorns. A tasty dinner AND the most compelling Mack Brown team yet thanks to Gene Chizik's baby thug D. Bevo wants a veggie burger.

Big 10: Michigan State. Drew Stanton is playing with his eyes closed right now, and may be able to get away with it for the rest of the year.

Big East: USF! Unless Jim Leavitt is struck by lightning--a likely occurrence considering Tampa's spot as the lightning capital of the world--the Bulls look as good as anyone does in this wretched excuse for a BCS conference. At least they'll give Notre Dame a sure W in four out of their next five bowl games...

Pac 10: USC. Ride that Trojan 'till it breaks.

SEC: Alabama's the rising suspect here, but that offense--struggling against a woeful Arkansas team--has a raging Florida D coming into town this weekend. Hard not to like meanass men in crimson for the title, though. We'd give our eyeteeth to see them lose this weekend.

At-large:Notre Dame. Of course they'll end up with a bid. It's inevitable. They'll lose two and still get the bid and pound the Big East rep. With Louisville out of the running--and they are now out---ND's reputation and fanbase will easily secure the slot barring a third victory. (OMG SOOOO CUTE! As Brian would say...) Dick Ebersol lights a cigar with hundred dollar bill on this one and Weis' baptism as the next savior of South Bend comes full circle.

2. What team currently out of the Top 10 (AP or Coach's, doesn't really matter), has the best chance of ending up in the title game?

Cal All hinges on the USC game, but no one else in the Pac-10 is going to match Cal for scheme, personnel, and coaching. A win against the Trojans and a clean slate and title game slot is Tedford's.

3. When you're watching a game, what type of fan can you absolutely not tolerate being around?

The Sports Sociopath. The guy who posts thirty-seven replies back and forth with a rival's fan on a message board about how "No, I'll be focking UR wife in the AZZ after da game." The guy who's not happy unless a victory leaves tire tracks on the opponent's back. (Clarification: coaches like this are great; fans who are, well, aren't. ) The guy who's looking for a fight but too chickenshit to throw a punch and land in jail like an honorable hooligan. The guy who loves the rivalry before THE GAME. The man who makes comments that make you start scanning his girlfriend for signs of obvious physical abuse.

Yeah, that asswipe. He's the one we'd create a separate pen for in our football utopia.

Bonus: A sizable portion of Michigan fandom is in full meltdown mode (myself especially). Some have chosen to sequester themselves for this weekend's game against MSU to avoid scaring children, causing long-term psychological damage to those in the near vicinity, and most especially to avoid jail (I'm not saying this is me per se). Anyways, we need some help. Give us some ideas for replacements for LLLyd Carr (3 L's for the number of losses per year, and no O this year either). Assistant coaches, head coaches elsewhere, etc. Please, give us something to look forward to.

Norm Chow. Yours for a song after a year or two with the Titans. He should be the first person they call if Carr gets the concrete shoes, and if not, Bo Schembecler ends up in Lake Michigan, too.