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Ivan Maisel writes an astonishing article on the BCS' new round of negotiations. We like Maisel, both for his rumbly Alabama accent when he runs lucid, un-hysterical commentary on ESPN (is there anything that doesn't outrage Sean Salisbury?) and his ability to make an "Erica Kane" reference without seeming gay. For a sportswriter, that's the equivalent of landing a triple lutz without a wobble. The real mindfuck comes a few paragraphs down with this jaw-dropping comment:

"Up until last year, there hasn't been a real focus on integrity," said Big 12 commissioner and BCS chair Kevin Weiberg. "That seemed to be a new element."

The other astounding nugget in the article: with their ass in the wind following the departure of the AP poll, the BCS is actively seeking new voters for its poll. Anyone. Please. Considering the total absurdity of the system as it is, we have our own suggestion for an unbiased, accomplished set of BCS voters:

Mack Brown couldn't beg his way into a BCS slot with these voters. That old Simon's too tough for that.