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GLANVILLE SAYS: FUCK THE COLD, I'M HEADING TO HAWAII

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In a moment of temporary sanity, Jerry Glanville has decided not to take a job coaching a D-II team in Aberdeen, S.D. and instead has taken the defensive coordinator position at Hawaii with old Falcons buddy June Jones.

We think this is a remarkable story for a number of reasons. First, Jerry Glanville actually displayed remarkable sanity in deciding to coach in a tropical paradise over Aberdeen, S.D. He can throw nine players over the line of scrimmage as often as he likes, play eighteen any day of the week he chooses (except for Saturday, and who knows about that, really,) and he won't have to plug his car into a socket to keep the engine from freezing dead in the subzero temperatures.

Second, we look forward to Glanville's inevitable embrace of the Magnum P.I look, hopefully sans short shorts. We predict he shows up to the first day of practice in a Ferrari wearing a mustache, floral shirt, and Tigers baseball cap.

Third, this means Hawaii gets more tv exposure than usual, since they'll be throwing the ball 55 times a game and blitzing the hell out of their opponents all day long. While it might make the football fundies reach for the remote, we'll savor the late night ESPN2 game where Hawaii scores 72 and loses in a game where the wideouts start to collapse in mid-run due to dehydration in the late second quarter.

Fourth, it's our first link to the great Len Pasquarelli, the second greatest football writer on the planet. Really. We're just blushing as we type this.

Magnum: a huge Warriors fan, I'm sure.