MUSTACHE OF THE DAY: ROGUE BLOGGER
Bearded lunatic no more: we’re our own Mustache Wednesday today.
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Orson Swindle and Stranko Montana are two men pushing thirty who should know better than to run a college football blog, but evidently don't. Both graduated from the University of Florida, and both agree that college football is far too important to be left to the professionals.
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1
Sexy. All you need now is mustache wax:
http://www.oregonwildhair.com/images/Wax%20Tin.jpg
Comment by Whohah — March 5, 2025 @ 6:06 pm
2
bravo.
Comment by ryan — March 5, 2025 @ 6:13 pm
3
You look like a cross between the album cover of Mr. Oizo’s “Moustache (Half a Scissor)” and Catfish Hunter… I guess that’s a good thing
Comment by worstfan — March 5, 2025 @ 6:14 pm
4
I hope that’s a shadow beneath the bottom lip. Otherwise, I give it a Chuck Amato SEX-AAAY!
Comment by Allahver Fist — March 5, 2025 @ 6:18 pm
5
…Doc?
Comment by Holly — March 5, 2025 @ 6:19 pm
6
…yeah…yeah, you look like a guy who could go to Tech.
Comment by blackertai — March 5, 2025 @ 6:20 pm
7
Men of Atlanta, lock up your daughters, wives, and quite possibly your farm animals, as the lusty magnetism of that upper lip pelt knows no bounds.
Comment by VolunteerValtrex — March 5, 2025 @ 6:31 pm
8
You look like a pissed-off Ned Flanders.
Comment by GinFizzBear — March 5, 2025 @ 6:36 pm
9
That’s a MAN’s blogstache.
Comment by Disgruntled Goat — March 5, 2025 @ 6:44 pm
10
Farrokh Bulsara LIVES!
Comment by kleph — March 5, 2025 @ 6:53 pm
11
I’ll check out the stache right after I’m done appreciating those super rad specs.
Comment by chum1 — March 5, 2025 @ 6:53 pm
12
Orson, hate to say it, but it has been my observation that when the hairline begins receding, facial hair proliferates. It’s a subconscious thingy.
Comment by hunglikehussain — March 5, 2025 @ 6:58 pm
13
are you blogging today from a van with no windows?
Comment by Captain Awesome — March 5, 2025 @ 6:59 pm
14
if so, i bet it says “FREE CANDY!” on the side.
Comment by kleph — March 5, 2025 @ 7:07 pm
15
Damn, that’s it. That’s the look. The other day I was driving with my wife and the song, “Rambling Man” came on the radio. I told my wife this song reminds me of a guy down on his luck, girlfriend just dumped him, this song in the background playing, and him sitting on a bed, alone, with a malboro in his mouth, cherry dangling about 2 inches, half bottle of Jack sitting on the nightstand and he’s holding a gun in his hands, spinning the full cylinder, thinking… just thinking.
Comment by Out of Conference — March 5, 2025 @ 8:34 pm
16
Bravo, Orson, Bravo! Good work!
Comment by LL — March 5, 2025 @ 9:08 pm
17
A look that says, “Police remain on the lookout at this hour…”
Comment by VandyJ — March 5, 2025 @ 9:09 pm
18
“…say, you got any mora that saspurillah?”
Comment by robert — March 5, 2025 @ 9:26 pm
19
What? No Atlanta Sunset backdrop? Weeeak.
I’m sure that mustache is getting its fair share of action in the sack. No lady can resist the lusty tingle of a good solid American Mustache Ride.
Btw, I think we’ve been misspelling the word. Wikipedia (all knowing all seeing eye that it is) has the word with an “O”
Comment by Brian — March 5, 2025 @ 9:27 pm
20
Thomas Magnum meets Jack Nicholson from The Shining.
Comment by Vol — March 5, 2025 @ 9:36 pm
21
In another week, O, or maybe two or three, that thing’ll look bitchin’.
Comment by NRBQ — March 5, 2025 @ 9:46 pm
22
I use the “moustache” spelling, which I assume to be the British spelling. Those pansies love to insert vowels unnecessarily. I tend to default to their spellings in spite of their feminity. I mean we stole all this cultural shit from them.
Comment by Biggus Rickus — March 5, 2025 @ 9:50 pm
23
Also, when Orson is arrested for sending explosives to key members of the local, state and federal government, I won’t be surprised.
Comment by Biggus Rickus — March 5, 2025 @ 9:51 pm
24
Damn, Hyneman. By a fucking comb, why don’t you.
Comment by Harris — March 5, 2025 @ 10:00 pm
25
Lanny MacDonald thinks it isn’t bad for a beginner.
You don’t have an amber alert out for you, do you?
Comment by Crabapple Buck — March 5, 2025 @ 10:01 pm
26
#23 - well Fulmer is the highest paid person working for the state of Tennessee, and he IS only a box of Krispy Kremes away from exploding….No Orson, don’t do it, think of the children, who would be covered in lard. It would be like the Exxon Valdez all over again.
Comment by Brian — March 5, 2025 @ 10:14 pm
27
you comb that hair with firecrackers or what???
Comment by gerry dorsey — March 5, 2025 @ 10:25 pm
28
A cross between Kurt Rambis and Steve Vaughn. F’en A, man!
Comment by Kerwin4two — March 5, 2025 @ 10:43 pm
29
Mmmmmm, lard.
Comment by Biggus Rickus — March 5, 2025 @ 10:55 pm
30
You know the great thing about high school girls?
Comment by WarCardinals — March 5, 2025 @ 11:47 pm
31
11:
I think I know where Orson got the idea for the frameless glasses/stache combination:
http://www.buddytv.com/articles/mythbusters/images/jamie-hyneman-1.jpg
I’m just sayin’.
Comment by gosouthgohard — March 6, 2025 @ 1:03 am
32
Now, that’s just plain lazy.
#24, you’re right. All Orson needs now is a beret and a shitload of chemistry equipment. Kids, don’t try this at home.
Comment by Raider Red — March 6, 2025 @ 1:52 am
33
The greatest love of all…is happening to me…
Comment by Elvis Peacock — March 6, 2025 @ 3:16 am
34
I am so ashamed.
You look SMOKING hot with that ’stache.
Who knew I liked the leather queen look?
Comment by The Conscience of a Nation — March 6, 2025 @ 8:10 am
35
I always figured you were a neck beard man, Orson.
Comment by Scalz1 — March 6, 2025 @ 8:13 am
36
That’s treading a fine line between “rugged mountain man” and “ask me about the time I met Chris Hansen.”
Comment by Doug — March 6, 2025 @ 8:30 am
37
Fierce. I would now consider letting you ride my Harley.
Comment by Because They Can — March 6, 2025 @ 8:38 am
38
Disturbing precedent being established here…lets all pray this does not lead to homemade bunda on Friday ….
Comment by Greenie — March 6, 2025 @ 9:09 am
39
I think my soul has been periced by your gaze, you crazy eyed rascal you.
Comment by dogterd — March 6, 2025 @ 9:12 am
40
I figured you would have gone the Charles Bronson route.
Comment by Geaux Irish — March 6, 2025 @ 9:22 am
41
Dude - Hide the crystal meth………
Comment by Last Dragon — March 6, 2025 @ 9:54 am
42
#15, OOC
Wow. I had never previously associated the “Ramblin’ Man” lyrics with suicide - just thought it was a statement of “Sorry darlin’, time to roll on. Thankya for the head, it was good.” The suicidal slant does make sense, particularly if the song had been written after the Allman Bros. Band fired Dickey Betts via fax machine about 8 years ago*. Alas, it predates this recent history.
The link, however, between Mr. Swindle’s new face and Mr. Richard Betts’ is eerily similar.
*why in the hell did Dickey have a fax machine? What the fuck for?
Comment by Allahver Fist — March 6, 2025 @ 10:03 am
43
Allahver Fist - very perceptive. I don’t think it reminds me of suicide so much as I thoght it would be the perfect song playing on the radio while this guy’s final minutes on earth played out.
By the way, when I described the scene to my wife, she said, “Good lord, what is wrong with you?” in a “You’re a dumbass” tone.
Comment by Out of Conference — March 6, 2025 @ 10:46 am
44
Greenie (@38): I laughed so hard at that, I got teary-eyed.
Fortunately, I work at a non-profit, so I’m just about the only one remaining here at this late hour of 5:07 p.m.
Comment by Big Ten Joe — March 6, 2025 @ 6:08 pm
45
Unless, of course, the Bunda was TCOANs……….
Comment by CLTDawg — March 6, 2025 @ 8:23 pm