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SHUTDOWN FULLCAST 8.01: DOMINATE THE OFFSEASON LIKE YOUR NAME WAS JIM HARBAUGH

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AT LAST WE CAN TALK ABOUT THE IMPORTANT THINGS, LIKE VAPING IN A FOOD COURT

2016 Nanjing Marathon
KUMAMON KING OF CITY MASCOTS WELCOMES YOU TO THE OFFSEASON
Photo by VCG/VCG via Getty Images

At last, with messy, time-consuming games out of the way, we can get into what college football is all about: The offseason.

The most important time of the year deserves its own preview. Coach says that failing to prepare is preparing to fail, and we couldn’t agree more. You can’t just jump into twenty page comment section arguments about transfer requirements. You can’t just expect to start a fierce twitter thread about whether a fourth-place finish in the Big Ten East is actually better than winning it outright. You know who wins a recruiting argument? Certainly not the person who doesn’t even know about composite rankings, that’s who.

No, no, you gotta ease into that, you gotta prepare, and you gotta have a plan. It’s a long ride, but we brought snacks and GPS, baby. Pee out the window, though. The bathrooms along this stretch are an abomination.

DISCUSSED:

  • Jason and Spencer only, as Ryan’s important work in the federal government was shutdown and thus so was Ryan
  • Opening discussion of cities that should have mascots and powerful food court vape wars
  • Why Philadelphia might be the most SEC city in America
  • Where Michigan will go this offseason, or “glory is forever, and malaria is treatable”
  • HERM EDWARDS IS GOING TO BE A DELIGHT EVEN IF HE DOESN’T KNOW HIS TEAM’S NAME. MAYBE ESPECIALLY BECAUSE HE DOESN’T KNOW HIS TEAM’S NAME.
  • How Josh Heupel might crumble under the pressure of defending UCF’s national title
  • Switching NFL coaches with college coaches goes very, very sideways
  • Why football players should be allowed to study abroad at other programs
  • Let’s just preseat both the Hot Seat, the Lukewarm Seat, and the Cold Seat Ready To Burst Into Flame At Any Second
  • Bobby Petrino reviewed! (It’s not good, and sounds like a mink caught in a trap)