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IT REALLY DOES JUST MEAN MORE

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BEHOLD THE SEC’S FAVORITE PROFANITY

CORRECTION: I AM LEAVING THIS ENTIRE MISREADING UP AS A WARNING AGAINST YOUR OWN STUPIDITY*

*NOTE: THIS APPLIES TO PRETTY MUCH EVERY POST ON THIS WEBSITE EVER

Beware infographics finding their way into your life. They lie, more often than not, and tell you things just to get you to share them on social media. This goes double for the ones about internet search terms, since those tend to be oddly weighted and inaccurate.

Correction: You can pay attention to the ones you want to believe simply because they are funny, and will be funny even if false. Example: We want to believe that as the world burned in 2016, the state of Tennessee really was most concerned with the question of whether Mr. T was dead or not. AS WE ALL SHOULD BE.

With that warning, we choose to believe this one is true, and that the colors in blue become deep, vibrant blue during college football season.

WELL WHAT ELSE ARE YOU GONNA CALL COACH AFTER THAT 4TH DOWN CALL

WAIT wait wait: enhance.

TIDE INDICATION: ROLLING

Enhaaaaaaaaaaance and—

THE CLOUD OF PROFANITY MAY BE SEEN HERE

There are two theories here. One: It really does matter more, and even the nice blonde lady in the SEC commercials is forced to go to the $20 level profanities to convey their displeasure when something goes wrong or gloriously right in a football game.

Two: That Nick Saban continues to generate an ambient cloud of profanity borne northward and to the east so large it appears on weather maps and statistical analysis of social media exchanges. If true, this is made all the more impressive by Nick Saban having no social media presence itself. He’s just seeping into the pores of everyone else around him at this point, a one-man Fukushima reactor of profanity.

We’ll take the second theory. Bonus insight: If you believed Miami fans were prone to using a certain homophobic slur more than others, well, there’s a map for you in there, too.

p.s. You’re darn right Kansas actually says “darn” like it’s 1950.