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ELI MANNING IS EVERY BORED LITTLE BROTHER

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IN DEFENSE OF THE SIBLING WHO GETS DRAGGED ALONG

Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports

Look, I know everyone (including SB Nation) is looking at this clip of Eli Manning and saying, "man, he's pretty pissed that he'll no longer be the Super Bowl king of the family."

It's definitely the easy conclusion, given how much every other member of the Manning family is cheering and celebrating; it's also the more interesting angle, because it suggests some insane level of fraternal competition that will probably end with somebody throwing a pitcher of beer during a nephew's bowling birthday party. SCREW YOU PEYTON, THIS LANE ISN'T PROPERLY OILED AND THAT'S BULLSHIT.

That is not my interpretation of this moment, however. I look at this face, and I do not see anger or resentment.

I see intense boredom. This is the look of a younger brother who has been forced to go to a sibling's dance recital/school play/8th grade graduation. Eli Manning wanted to spend this Sunday at Dave's house riding the moped Dave got for Christmas. Dave's dad is super cool like that, and their garage fridge always has Lunchables. Eli was going to bring over his Nerf crossbow and blaster, and he and Dave were going to ride the moped through the park in Dave's neighborhood and pretend it was Endor. It bugs Eli a little that Dave always gets to be Han Solo, but, like, Chewbacca's also super cool. (Eli is positive Chewbacca could beat up Han in a fight, if it ever came to that.)

But Eli's not at Dave's house, running around and shooting Nerf darts at mailboxes pretending they're stormtroopers and Dave's two dachshunds are Ewoks. He's sitting in this luxury box, wearing this stupid jacket and fuming that Olivia refuses to let him play Game Boy, even for 10 minutes.

Oh, and this stadium doesn't even sell Lunchables. Goddammit.