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THE INTERNET OFFENSE: CASE STUDY, BOISE STATE

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HOW RECKLESSLY ENTERTAINING WAS BOISE STATE LAST NIGHT

BYU v Boise State Photo by Loren Orr/Getty Images

The Internet Offense isn’t a mere concept. It is a real thing, and is practiced to some degree by a select group of heroes in the sport of college football. These teams are dedicated to doing one thing and one thing only: exactly what you would do in any given game situation, provided you are not a humble dullard hoping just to punt and kick your way into a 20-17 result.

One of those is Boise State, as evidenced by last night’s 28-27 win over BYU. How Internet Offense is Boise State on any given night? Let’s look at the evidence.

  • Did Boise pass deep out of their own endzone? Reasonably deep, yes, and certainly on first down. Over all they had a healthy 11.3 yards per pass, which is adventurous enough for us, especially when Rypien let it fly with his feet on orange painted turf and not blue.
  • Did Boise pass belligerently, often, and with great malice/mischief? Oh hell yes they did. On the first drive, Boise even did the NCAA video game special by running what appeared to be four vert, motioning the RB over, and then heaving downfield to a wide open RB running a go route. JUST LIKE YOU USED TO CALL IN NCAA, BECAUSE THE ONLY THING BETTER THAN FOUR VERTS IS FIVE VERTS. Thirty-nine attempts, 442 yards, and three TDs. That’s Internet Offense grade aggression.
  • Did Boise do some dumb/bold/ballsy/sort of insane things with the ball? Does two pick-sixes thrown like they weren’t a thing qualify? Yes, yes it does. Take those fourteen points, BYU. They’re useless to us, and you look like you need them.
  • Did they run the option? No, no, no, Boise with Brett Rypien should never run the option. He runs like he is wearing those magnetized prison boots from Face/Off.
  • Trick plays? First play, and it failed! Peak Internet Offense.
  • Without getting too laborious, anything else? Lessee, cooked their opponent into thinking a 4th and 19 fake punt from their own endzone was a good idea; handed BYU 14 points and still won; turned the ball over five times and still won; only went for it once on 4th down, which is a debit from their otherwise much-credited account; played like madmen and won. Punted three times, which is pretty great if you’re being honest about the few times in a game where you really should punt.

Conclusion: Yeah, generally Boise played pretty great Internet Offense last night, and most nights in 2016, to be honest. Here’s that fake punt, which was undoubtedly the only category BYU topped Boise State in via sheer Internet Offense-ness.

College football is good, and then it can soar to whatever this is. That was a designed play, that BYU ran on purpose.