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MAJOR PIECES OF POPULAR CULTURE YOU HAVE NEVER CONSUMED

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AND NEVER PLAN TO

I have never seen Titanic, which is only odd because it came out when I was 14, and if you were 14 in 1997, there was not a lot to do with your spare time other than go to a) the mall b) the Steak 'n Shake just outside of the mall or c) the movies. These are some of the other films I paid to see in the theater in that same year:

The Lost World: Jurassic Park

Life Is Beautiful

Austin Powers

Contact

Men In Black

Tomorrow Never Dies

Liar Liar

In & Out

The Saint

Spice World

The Edge

Volcano

The Man Who Knew Little

We can all agree that this list is, at best, mixed, and many of those films are probably not significantly better than Titanic. And I'm certain all my friends at the time went to see Titanic, some multiple times. It didn't make $300 million in less than two months on accident.

Still, the fact remains: I've never seen Titanic, and, frankly, I have no plans to do so. When it comes on basic cable, I change the channel. This 18 year streak is meaningless, sure, but wouldn't breaking it be just as stupid? Besides, it's never really harmed my ability to make Billy Zane jokes; in 1996, I paid money to see The Phantom.

So: what's the biggest piece of popular culture with which you've never interacted and likely never will?