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LOUISVILLE'S NEW HELMET IS COMING FOR YOU

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IN THE NIGHT, WHEN YOU THINK YOU ARE SAFE IN YOUR BED

Adidas unveiled new Louisville uniforms today, and, well, they're Adidas uniforms. Whether you like them or not isn't really the point, unless you're a top-level high school football player with a scholarship offer from Louisville. If you are a top-level high school football player, I can't imagine EDSBS has been helpful to you in the slightest. You should leave now before a recruiting service finds out and knocks a star off your rating.

Everyone else, take a look.

There's definitely a counterfeit Oregon feel to this jersey, and the numbering is a little track-listing-from-a-Bush-album-nobody-bought. But it's not terrible and, again, we're not the target audience.

You know, I kind of like these gloves! Properly executed, you can get the entire offense flapping these suckers at once and become Football Hitchcock. MAKE A PLAY, TIPPI HEDREN.

Wait, what the fuck? What is going on with those eyes?

NO NO NO NO NO

OH MY GOD PLEASE HELP

CAN ANYONE HEAR ME

OH MY GOD NO NO NO NO NO NO

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HELLBIRD PLEASE I BEG YOU

AVIMIOWRB!NVVKMSI)M@J#VNA:MV$IA@J$G:WEGIVMR(YJIQMVNUE