THE MC SAYS STOP USING LAME BIKINI PHOTOSHOPS

EDSBS CHARITY BOWL HOME STRETCH DONATE HERE AND BE AWESOME AND MAYBE HELP US GET A DISFIGURING BIG TEN-THEMED TATTOO

He's already deleted it, but dammit, college football coaches: stop sending out recruiting materials that stoop to the level of Sports Illustrated's last functional ploy to keep your grandfather subscribed. This may be the image Pitt TE coach Tim Salem tweeted out. Then again, maybe it isn't.

Like you even think of having a bikini on when you think of "Pitt swimwear." Pitt swimwear is more like a stretched out Budweiser one-piece that sags in the ass and has a hole in the seam and yanno maybe a few cigarette burns from where you fell asleep at the lake in it. (No, not the beach: at the lake, and in a boat you definitely do not own.) We repeat our threat, though: Wannstedt can be photoshopped onto any piece of swimwear. We'll do it. That's a threat.

And now in a not at all unnatural segue: updates on the EDSBS Charity Drive!

WELL IT'S CLOSE BUT: At north of $26K as of lunch today, we are racing toward the finish and the goal of $30K for the drive. Michigan remains way, way in the lead, both in terms of total donors AND a major contribution of $1,200 from an individual yesterday.  They weren't alone, though: a K-State donor kicked in $700 (for the year of Bill Snyder's birth in Bavaria) and a Notre Dame donor dropped a grand to try and make us say nice things about Notre Dame.

NICE THING ABOUT NOTRE DAME: They have gorgeous landscaping, and we love at least eight people who went there. Oh! And this!

TODAY'S DONATION: Florida people, help us out and donate in the proper sum to at least beat Alabama, something we haven't done since 2008. But oh, what a day that was.

TIM TEBOW IS THE GREATEST PASSER OF OUR TIME. We have two days left, Gators.

WHEN IS THIS OVER? We let it run through Sunday, though we're not exactly tight about Sunday donations that get in under the wire. We'll announce a winner on Monday, and if we get over $30K it's time to go tattoo shoppin'.

GIVE? Yes, give here, and give often to a good cause, New American Pathways. Full standings follow.