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EDSBS BOWL CHARITY UPDATE (AND THE ONLY THING WE LEARNED IN SPRING)

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GO DAWGS AND PLEASE SOMEONE ELSE WRITE A BIG CHECK WE CAN'T LIVE WITH THIS

Tim Heitman-USA TODAY Sports

The EDSBS Charity Bowl is underway. Donate here frequently for best results.

We learned very little from spring practice. For instance, your secondary might be really good, like Alabama's after intercepting six passes in their spring game. Then again, maybe Alabama's quarterback play reeks. You'll never know, because we don't play spring scrimmages in college football because [INSERT SENSE HERE].

Or maybe your defense is "further along than your offense," like Florida, which is news to no one given Will Muschamp's fetish for cutting the arms off his team and insisting they kick their way to victory. Or maybe you've already set up the inevitable quarterback controversy by letting your backup look really, really good like Max Browne did in USC's spring game. Yes, we know Cody Kessler is the starter. But now you have something to flimsily justify the BENCH HIM AND PUT IN THE OTHER GUY chants you'll get the first time Kessler struggles. Probably against Arizona State, perhaps. (Okay, definitely against Arizona State.)

What we did learn that we can say for sure. First, Laquan McGowan is a 400 pound tight end, and will play this position for Baylor more in 2015. This is him throwing Bryce Petty into the roof of a stadium in celebration.

Laquanthrowsintosun

Second: Cal's receivers' coach decided to unwind a bit at the Motel 6.

Third: THE EDSBS CHARITY BOWL IS ROLLING LIKE SO MANY TIDES. As of this post we're at $7900 and change and rising. That's superb for day one, and hopefully we can push to finish over ten grand on the day. We'll get numbers later tonight, but the surprise leader for individual donations as of a few hours ago was a UGA donation. This causes us actual physical pain, but: g o  d a w g s.

(Please someone donate more than $540 individually and end this agony.)

Thank you for your continued support of EDSBS and Nick Saban Mercedes. Roll damn charitable Tide.