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WHEN THERE'S A GAME AT NOTRE DAME

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WHY

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

WHY IS YOUR PRAYER SYSTEM BANDWIDTH-BASED

THIS ENTIRE CONCEPT CONFUSES AND ENRAGES US

WHY WOULD A DIVINE POWER RUN THINGS ON A LANDLINE OR CAPACITY-LIMITED TRANSMISSION SYSTEM

IT'S NOT SKYPE FOR JESUS

WHY DOESN'T THE POPE HAVE A WORKAROUND OR BACKUP SYSTEM

WHY DO YOU THINK GOD LOVES YOUR FOOTBALL TEAM WHEN THERE'S A LOT OF EVIDENCE HE LOVES FLORIDA STATE AND OHIO STATE AND WOULD THEREFORE BE A DERANGED AND MALICIOUS DEITY

WHEN A MAN SITS DOWN ALONE WITH AN ACOUSTIC GUITAR ARREST THAT MAN BEFORE HE GETS TO THE SECOND VERSE

WHYYYYYYYYYY