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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL: LANE KIFFIN DID THAT DUMB THING FIRST

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THAT THING YOU DID, IT'S BEEN DONE BY A MUMBLING OFFENSIVE GENIUS

Matt Kartozian-USA TODAY Sports

As usual, the derivative, wholly unimaginative NFL cannot even invent its own scandals without stealing wholesale from college football. If you're unclear on the rule, then a review is in order: Lane Kiffin did it first.

To wit:

Inflating or deflating balls to gain a marginal competitive advantage? Lane Kiffin did it first. Getting hired via family connections, a la Jim Harbaugh hiring his son Jay to coach at Michigan even though he's only 25? Lane Kiffin did it first, and then went a step further by getting his dad a giant contract at both Tennessee AND USC. (Your salsa of nepotism doesn't even begin to tingle the taste buds on Lane's tongue, Jim.) Staying on Harbaugh, that whole "going back to college after a stint in the Bay Area that ended after a rift with management?" Lane Kiffin did it first, too, and did it way, way more spectacularly.

It continues. Getting tiffy with Urban Meyer? Lane Kiffin did it first. Losing heinously to Virginia Tech? Lane Kiffin did that first, too, Urban. Take every story you care to about NFL coaches leaving in cold fashion, and flush them all because Lane Kiffin hightailed it out of Knoxville with a speed Doug Marrone would describe as impersonal. He was even fired in a more outlandish way than you could imagine, with USC's brass leaving him at LAX at an undisclosed location somewhere along the arrivals pickup lane. Someday, we vow, we will mark this spot with a tiny placard bearing his name and the words "USC: Trojans never leave a man behind unless he just gave up 62 points to Arizona State."

By the time he finishes his coaching career, Lane Kiffin will have done everything, and likely done it before someone in the NFL did it, even if that person is Lane Kiffin. This posits the existence of a second Raiders tenure for Kiffin, which oh ho ho ho, you know you want to happen. If anyone can be the first man to be fired by two generations of an ownership family, that man is Lane Kiffin.