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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL IS MIDSUMMER HATIN'

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QUESTIONS AND COCKTAILS WILL BE TAKEN

USA TODAY Sports

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Pleasure to be here in Hoover. They say Nature abhors a vacuum, and for once she and I agree.

Got good golf here in Birmingham, though. Played from the white tees, which are separate from the black tees here.

Wanna thank Commissioner Slive for putting this together. Only a UVA grad could gather this many sad men in khakis who don't know how to love.

I heard Will Muschamp read off the whole roster yesterday. That's a big accomplishment for a UGA grad.

Will's been watching the World Cup. Lotta falling and crying before scoring there, too.

Lotta people impressed by the turnaround Dan Mullen's put together. But if you've been to Starkville, you know turning around is the best thing you can do.

Is Les here? He might wanna call someone, his unicorn's been booted in the parking lot.

Derek Mason doesn't believe in redshirting? Well, Bobby Bowden doesn't believe in electricity and that worked out okay.

Why's that Bama fan wearin' Nick's national championship tube top on his head?

If Nick's talking and wants one more second, y'all just give it to him and see what happens, okay?

Might hang around til Thursday and see if Coach Richt wants to play cards. I brought the title to my house, since i know he won't win that.

Think we're handing out too many credentials to this, though. Hustler sent Bret Biele-he is? Still? Well knock me over with a feather.

Gary Pinkel? Most driven coach in the SEC.

Y'all know how the Greeks thought certain kinds of birds were omens of the future? Kevin Sumlin brought his punter.

You might want to watch your wife around ol' Jesse Palmer over there. He'll throw some game. It'll get intercepted by another woman, but still.

This is the best part of Kentucky football, because it's sitting indoors watching a coach in a suit.

Thank y'all for coming. Stick around for the Tennessee guys, since you won't talk to them again after September.