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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 12/2/2014

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UAB FOOTBALL IS RIGHT AT THE TOP OF THE GOVERNOR'S LIST ALONG WITH MALARIA AND POVERTY LOL

Nelson Chenault-USA TODAY Sports

Q: DOES BRADY HOKE STILL HAVE A JOB? A: Yes, but maybe not for long.

The coaching poachin' season is fun, but when Michigan AND Florida are both fully open? Oh, that's when someone drops a sparkler into the bag of fireworks in the backseat of the car on the way down the interstate.

HOW'S FLORIDA? Living without a Freeze warning thanks to Ole Miss banking up and giving their coach a new $4 million deal, and thus pushing the Florida job search forward to such exciting candidates as Josh McDaniels, a useless NFL assistant despised by his co-workers with little college football coaching experience. SOUNDS PERFECT LET'S GIVE HIM MILLIONS.

WE THOUGHT WE CAME OFF PRETTY WELL HERE. The man who snitched on Gurley talks, and shockingly it's not us.

WE'LL LOOK INTO THIS URGENT PROBLEM AS SOON AS WE FIX EVERY OTHER SERIOUS ISSUE IN ALABAMA. In other words, the governor of Alabama will fix the UAB football situation if he can, which given his powers as the head of a state that can barely pave its own roads, means UAB is as good as dead. (Which is exactly what everyone on the BOT has always wanted anyway.)

THIS IS AGAINST SEVERAL SECTIONS OF THE GEORGIA CONSTITUTION. UGA strength coach Joe Tereshinski resigned, leaving the Bulldogs without a Tereshinski in the organization for the first time in 70 years. <---feels true, at least.

[WHISTLES PAST THE GRAVEYARD] Well sure, let's just not change football in any way whatsoever.