Cold? You said you're cold? Mr. Human Polar Bear here doesn't know nothing about that. He's thinking about putting some shorts on. They're not even particularly thick. One might call them "uncomfortably sheer." Oh well. He's dominating this weather, and you're gonna see the outline of his genitals whether you want to or not.
This is your second open thread. Yo, somebody get Human Polar Bear a Slurpee.