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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 10/9/2014

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CLAP ALONG IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOUR TEAM IS THREE AND TWO

Joshua S. Kelly-USA TODAY Sports

GOOD MORNING

Mute it to enjoy your own private David Lynch movie!

FIIIIIIIIIIIGHT. Despite saying Paul Johnson was the best in the business at the option offense, David Cutcliffe did slip in a comment about wondering why any receiver would want to play in Georgia Tech's flexbone/paleolithic attack in an interview this week. Reminder: Paul Johnson doesn't care. That's a rule in life in general, but while he still doesn't care about anything including David Cutcliffe's opinions, he does enjoy telling people to go fuck a stump.

"How many receivers have they put in the NFL?" Johnson asked after the Yellow Jackets’ Wednesday practice in preparation for Saturday’s game against Duke. "I can tell you. None. They’ve had one offensive player (drafted by) the NFL in his six years there. … He probably ought to worry about his own business."

Paul Johnson is 6-0 against Duke in David Cutcliffe's tenure, and both men are somehow younger than Pete Carroll.

TUBERVILLE IS A ONE MAN SHADE TREE. Godfrey went to Cincy's game against Ohio State and got their full game prep on record, including Tommy Tuberville talking about Ohio State, and somehow ending up talking shit about  Dennis Franchione.

"Urban went to school here. So did his wife. Half his family did. My sister was a professor at Ohio State back in the '80s. Dang, I should've mentioned that in the press deal. But no, that always seemed stupid to me, when Dennis [Franchione] wouldn't say Auburn's name when he was at Alabama. Like no one knew our who our program was. But, hey, Dennis wasn't there long."

Well, he wasn't, was he?

THEY HAD ONE? The coordinator of officiating in the Pac-12 resigned, surprising everyone with his existence.

THIS WAS GOING TO BE SOME SAD SPECULATION ON WHETHER JEFF DRISKEL OR WILL GRIER WAS GOING TO START AT QB FOR FLORIDA. Instead it is just going to be a picture of a stupid fucking raccoon with a goddamn can stuck on its stupid fucking head, because that is this football program right now. Goddammit you stupid fucking football program with a goddamn can on its godforsaken head.

ETC: The man says you can't throw beer bottles out of a stolen forklift while telling the cops to fuck off and driving said forklift down an interstate, well shit, then the man's not worth listening to, dude.