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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 10/3/2014

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YOU MISSED A DUMB, FUN GAME IF YOU FELL ASLEEP LAST NIGHT

Scott Olmos-USA TODAY Sports

PREVIOUS! If you were a sensible person and went to bed last night and missed Arizona/Oregon, you missed a lot of very dumb and entertaining things. A Pac-12 referee yelled the word PREVIOUS like it was his MC handle, and then said nothing else:

PREVIOUS MOBBBBB ONLY ON GLASSES REF RECORDS; Y'ALL ALREADY KNOW. You missed an entire half of Pac-12 football ending in a 7-3 halftime score, Anu Solomon completing a pass to himself, a disgraceful enforcement of the already disgraceful celebration penalty on a gesture made a good thirty yards from the play, more baffling officiating, Oregon running on two crucial third downs late in the game and then not going for it on 4th down, and ultimately a 31-24 victory for the Wildcats proving Rich Rodriguez is a very good coach, Oregon has some serious issues, Pac-12 officials are an atrocity, and that Florida fans will spend the rest of the season flooding our Twitter timeline with "HEY THIS COACH IS PRETTY GOOD." (He is! The deals you can find just rummaging through Michigan's dumpsters are amazing.)

LSU STARTS BRANDON HARRIS. Auburn/LSU is getting a bit lost in all the projected chaos of week six, but "Les Miles on the road with a freshman QB" sounds dangerous and ill-advised and LSU is totally winning this football game, aren't they?

OLE MISS IS HERE TO SELL THINGS. Like itself, since Gameday and Alabama and a lofty ranking are probably as much about recruiting tomorrow as actually winning the football game. This marks a sign of progress, as Ole Miss fans are now working to claim never losing the party AND the recruiting pitch in lieu of any serious confidence about football outcomes.

NOT REALLY THAT ODD. Where's UNC? It's not on this map at all, and okay maybe that's right now that we said it out loud like that.

CONFIDENCE IS GOOD. When you have nothing else, Vandy, it's what you have to lean on, that confidence. [murmurs to self as you line up against Todd Gurley: "I'm not going to burst into flames right now. Probably."]

"VICTORY SMELLS LIKE CARCINOGENS." SDSU and Fresno State play for an oil can. Like, a real, smelly-as-hell oil can.