The Curious Index is being retired and replaced with this, The Morning Constitutional. Rather than running you through four or five items of note, we're highlighting just one, because efficiency and streamlining and other business buzzwords. Future-proof.
Let me begin by emphasizing the respect I have for electricity. I'm often labeled as "old-fashioned" or "stodgy," and, in some ways, I am. But I am not wholly opposed to progress or scientific advancement. I think my collection of moisture-wicking polo shirts prove that point. Electricity is a wonderful phenomenon; it's made medicine, transportation, and entertainment able to leap forward in ways our ancestors might never have thought possible.
Without electricity, I would have to send recruits dozens and dozens of messenger birds. Would I do that? Of course, because I'm not going to let Alabama football languish on my watch. I'd also watch frame after frame of hand drawn tape on opponents if we lived in a world without electricity. The business we're engaged in moves forward no matter what the technological backdrop.
Again, though, I want to reiterate that I really do have a lot of regard for electric current. We're all clear on that? Good. Now, does anyone have any questions about football?
Whether or how I dance on recruiting visits is not about football. Next question.
Have I ever been on a "party ride?" Again, I'm happy to answer questions about FOOTBALL, not my personal life. Any questions about FOOTBALL?
I think we got Derrick Henry plenty of carries.
Now, I just told you I wanted to talk about football, and then you ask me why I've got no dip in my quarter turn. You all have a wonderful day.