JEREMY HILL SNEAK ATTACKS HIS WAY INTO THE FULMER CUP

There are a few basic rules you should follow when partaking in a night out on the town in Baton Rouge, Louisiana:

1) The drinking age is not a legal absolute but more a jumping off point for vigorous negotiations.

2) Assume that everyone has a weapon on them at all times.

3) There will be Jager involved at some point in the night. The sooner you accept that, the better off you'll be.

4) Passing out in public is socially acceptable. Vomiting on yourself while passed out in public is when you've crossed the line.

5) Should you find yourself walking out of a bar anywhere near an LSU football player, KEEP YOUR HEAD ON A SWIVEL.

Rule #5 was not followed by the unfortunate deck-shoed gentleman walking out of Reggie's this past April when he found himself in the company of LSU running back Jeremy Hill (he's the one conveniently wearing LSU football gear) and some of his friends. Implementing a move that worked well for Ric Flair and the Four Horsemen for many decades, Hill is seen sucker punching victim only to have his half-shirted friend attack from the rear.

For his trouble, Hill, today, was given 2 years probation and made to pay medical restitution for the injuries caused. Thats 2 points for LSU in the Fulmer Cup standings and a cage match for Hill and his friend against the Rock-n-Roll Express at the upcoming Starcade pay-per-view in Greensboro, North Carolina.