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THEY ALWAYS LEAVE A COUCH AS A REMINDER
You can flee to the West, but your past doesn't need water and can travel across the desert faster than any horse, Rich Rod.
PHIL STEELE'S POWER RANKINGS NEVER INCLUDE COACHING FOIBLES. And that is how you rank FSU at three, and USC at six. Computers can predict a lot, but they can never account for outright incompetence and the random flaky Jimbo Fisher freakout.
THE BIG TEN'S SUPREME DOOMSDAY PREPPERS. Admire the psychological preparation of Buckeyes fans who are already preparing for everyone to poop on Ohio State's schedule. (Which they should, even though like most scheduling debacles very little of this is Ohio State's fault.)
CLIFTON DUCK. This recruit does not look like a duck. This recruit does not look like a duck. This recruit named Clifton Duck does not look like a duck stop that he doesn't nope nope nope.
AWWWWW, ILLINOIS SENDS THANK YOU NOTES. Written on the back of old Rose Bowl stationery, and do remember that Illinois under Ron Zook DID go to a Rose Bowl because life is funny like that sometimes.
ETC: Carl Sagan exited bad parties like no other. Rick is indeed crazy for that one. Fuckin' scientists, man. This is fantastic on Daft Punk and Kanye's new albums. Hey, look, an interesting NFL article!
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