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THE CURIOUS INDEX, 3/26/2013

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THE CURIOUS INDEX IS NOT HAVING FUN BEING HIT BY ALL THESE BIG DUDES

Streeter Lecka

THIS DOES NOT LOOK LIKE FUN. The defensive gauntlet drill for LSU involves John Chavis yelling at you while you beat three or sometimes four defenders to a tackling dummy seems like the worst conditioning drill in the world, mostly because it is.

At first we watched and thought, "My, #91 is having the opposite of a good time," but then realized that no, no one has anything resembling a good time when the entire purpose of the drill is to kick your ass, and then repeat that asskicking.

GLORIOUS NEWS. Marcus Lattimore talked with Garnet and Black Attack, and that's cool, but the better news is that his recovery is going splendidly.

HAHAHA LIKE DABO HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS. The Falcons are visiting Clemson not just to learn about the read-option, but also likely to pick up a few things about Chad Morris' high-tempo offense. Dabo Swinney will also be there.

ALSO GLORIOUS NEWS. Maryland doesn't have a copy of its Big Ten contract, nor a copy of its current ACC TV deal. This is allegedly standard practice in university athletics, following the standard operating procedures of..um...major religions, and no one else.

A COURTEOUS REMINDER: Not all tweets are real, not all people on the internet are real, and nothing on the internet is actually real--including this sentence. [space noises]

WHAT WAS IT BEFORE? The Washington State football team attained an all-time high team GPA of 2.66 this spring, beating the previous record of oh god what the hell was the worst one. (Answer: Bill Doba 2007, with cumulative GPA of "banana point eight.")

LAW IS A PRECISE INSTRUMENT AND WAIT NO MAYBE IT ISN'T. This seems worthy of legislation, Arkansas.

ETC: TO HELL WITH EL TRI. We don't understand a second of what is going on in this story about Buzz Bissinger's leather addiction, but we couldn't stop reading it, either.